Devils Are Here
by Queens-of-dahkness
Summary: Our heroes from Storybrooke have defeated a lot of villains together, but what happens when all these villains come back from the death, looking for revenge? Basically how I think the show should have gone, since A&E keep killing our favorite characters and destroying OTPS (kidding, ofcourse I love their writing) Please don't expect lots of canon ships. Takes place after 6x04.
1. Chapter 1

_**Autor's note: Okay so I haven't written any fanfiction since forever so please don't expect a lot from this Xd Basically my reason for writing this fanfic is that after last episode A &E totally unnecessary killed off Hyde (and Jeckyll but who cares about him) I'm 100% done with how they always kill off my favorite characters and destroy my OTP's and I feel like I'm not the only one xD. So yeah. This is basically how the show would continue if I was to decide. I'll try to come up with a serious storyline and stuff but it will probably just be a lot of chaos and love drama. I don't own OUAT, which after reading this fanfic you'll probably realize is a good thing. The length of the chapters will probably really depend on the chapter, I know that the first one is awfully long but I'll try to keep it shorter in the next ones. Warning: Might include bad language, hints of sexual content, violence. Lots of craziness and the most random pairings ever. Takes place after 6x04. **_

It was only after Emma Swan had set her first steps outside that she realized something was wrong.

It was just one day after Killian killed off Jeckyll and Hyde. Ofcourse there were still the Evil Queen and other problems to be dealt with, but a small part of her had hoped that now finally things would go back to normal. She was on her way to the Sherrif station, a cup of coffee in her hand, but stopped walking just as she was about to get in her yellow bug. The air felt… strange. Like something was about to happen. She frowned and slowly looked up at the sky. Emma forgot to breathe for a moment.

At first sight, the sky seemed normal, except for the fact it seemed slightly glowing. But when she turned her head to the right, in the direction of the sea, the bright blue sky faded into green. It was hard to see because of the clouds, but in the distance… something was happening. Emma squeezed her eyes shut trying to get a better sight.

It was like a small tornado was appearing above the lake.

Emma shook her head and took a deep breath. "It's probably just the headache and the lack of sleep…" she mumbled. She had other things on her mind today, like trying to find a way to stop the Evil Queen from killing everyone in this town, a way that did not include Regina's death. She had barely slept tonight because of her concern about her friend's fate. And also Killian, she had asked him to move in with her but now she was starting to doubt her own offer. She wasn't sure if she was ready right now, not when everything was so chaotic. She simply didn't have any time to worry about stupid things that probably only existed in her imagination anyway.

"Emma?" she got interrupted in her thoughts by the familiar voice of her mother behind her. Emma turned around and attempted to smile. "Mom, hi."

Snow frowned in concern. "Emma, are you okay? You seem… worried."

Ofcourse she wouldn't be able to hide her thoughts from her mother. "It's nothing, mom. Just… something stupid." Emma glanced in the direction of the green sky again.

Snow followed her daughter's gaze and her eyes widened. "Woah… what's happening over there?"

Emma shrugged. "I have no idea, it's probably not important. Anyways, I have to go to work now. I'll see you around." She forced another smile, kissed her mother goodbye and got in the car, leaving Snow staring at the sky and mentally hoping it wasn't another villain trying to cause chaos in the once so peaceful Storybrooke.

* * *

Mr. Gold was just peacefully organizing things in his shop when the door slammed open. He didn't even have to look up to know who it was and sighed deeply. "The Evil Queen. Always a pleasure."

The Evil Queen didn't even answer him and walked straight over to him, slamming her hands down on the counter angrily. "Did you really think it would be this easy to get rid of us?"

He looked up at her with a wry smile. "My dear queen, I have no idea what you're talking about."

She rolled her eyes impatiently. "Stop playing stupid, you know what I'm talking about. Hyde. You think that now you've found the way to destroy him, you can destroy me as well?"

"Oh, I don't thínk that. As painful as it must be, I know. All that has to happen for you to die, is to kill Regina." Rumplestiltskin imparturbably continued what he was doing. "It's just that it's simply none of my concern, since you promised not to harm Belle and my son."

She sighed and leaned over the counter, closing the distance between them. "Is that why you killed him and not me?"

He didn't move, determined not to show any signs of being intimidated. "Actually, I'm not the one that killed him. The pirate did it." Still, he couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice after mentioning Killian, even now that guy practically saved Belle's life. "So honestly, I don't understand why you're coming to me."

"Wait, what?" She blinked in confusion and leaned back. "But the serum…"

"Yes, I did try to kill him, but apparantly, that serum wasn't enough. It was Killian who unintendetly killed him by stabbing his… other half, dr. Jeckyll."

"The pirate? Really?" She quickly recovered from her confusion and smirked. "Now that's dissapointing, I thought you were always the one to come up with the smart ideas, Gold," she stated mockingly.

Mr. Gold rolled his eyes. "Like I said, it was pure accidental. The pirate didn't know that killing the one would mean the other's death as well. All he wanted was to protect Belle." He tried to say it in a neutral way, but couldn't keep the flash of sadness from his face when he mentioned Belle. It was like he could still hear her saying that she didn't need his protection.

"Belle." Her smirk widened. "So that's what this is all about? You're not able to protect her, but the pirate is?" She laughed hard. "This is brilliant."

He narrowed his eyes. "Are we done making fun of me?"

She bit her lip and locked eyes with him, still smirking. "So I suppose that means you're still not tired of waiting for her to accept you?"

"Nope. Never," he responded immediately, sounding a lot more sure than he felt when she was looking at him the way she did now.

The Evil Queen laughed and stepped back. "Lovely. Oh, before I forgot: I didn't come here only to make fun of you."

"Yeah, I figured that," he replied sarcastically.

"I came here to warn you that you can't get rid of me that easily… or Hyde."

"I'm sorry to interrupt your dreams, dearie, but Hyde is death and there's no way to bring back people from the death."

"You think so?" She laughed. "That's funny."

"Oh really? Why is that?" He asked, getting slightly annoyed.

"Remember Zelena? Your almost-ex-lover, my sister? Well, we're friends now, and she might still have some… connections in the underworld. Connections that go deeper than you might expect."

She winked at him before walking out of the shop, loudly slamming the door behind her.

* * *

"Aye, how are you doing, love?"

Belle looked up from her cup of coffee, slightly shocked at the sudden voice waking her up from her thoughts, but she relaxed when she saw Killian sitting down in front of her. She was sitting at Granny's, but she had barely touched her food since she got here. "Oh, Killian. I'm… I'm fine." She forced a reassuring smile.

Killian smiled slightly. "Really? You almost got killed by some crazy freak with a split personality while being trapped yesterday, I surely wouldn't be fine after that."

She laughed a little. "Yeah, alright. I'm not fine, but I will be. What about you?"

Killian shrugged. "I don't know… things are crazy right now."

"Yeah… Lots of crazy stuff going on right now."

"Like, Emma asked me to move on with her lately, but we've barely talked since and it somehow seems like she's… avoiding me. Ofcourse she has other things on her mind right now, but I feel like she's starting to regret her decission now." He frowned and took a sip from his coffee.

"What? Oh… I meant after you practically killed a man yesterday." Belle laughed slightly. "Or two men, depends on how you view it…"

"Oh, that…" He laughed too and shrugged again. "Don't know, I've done worse back in my pirate days, yaknow?"

"I see. And about Emma…" She briefly placed her hand over his before shyly staring down at her coffee. "Don't worry about it too much, I'm sure she doesn't regret it. We both know Emma, she has probably spent a lot of time thinking this through and she wouldn't ask you if she wouldn't be hundred percent sure about it. Right? And why would she possibly regret wanting to move in with someone like you?"

Killian grinned. "I suppose you have a point, love."

They were silent for a moment. Belle took a small sip from her coffee.

She was happy for him and Emma that things were going so well between them. She was almost jealous of their relationship sometimes. It was obvious that Killian cared a lot for Emma, he was willing to do anything for her and wait for her as long as it would take. But her own husband, on the contrary, wouldn't even try to be a better man for her…

"What's going on out there?" Killian suddenly moved closer to the window and stared at the sky outside.

"What's wrong? Killian?" Belle glanced outside as well, noticing the concern on his face. She felt her chin drop at the sight of the sky.

The sky, usually blue, seemed to be glowing in some sort of way, and the further she looked, the more it seemed to fade into green. And that wasn't the most shocking part. Something in the air in the distance was moving.

"Well. That doesn't look very good," Killian stated dryly.

Belle felt her stomach turn. "Killian… Do you think Rumple did this?"

"I have no idea who or what caused this," he answered. "But whatever it is… I have a feeling it's bad news."

* * *

"Oh my god, are you freaking kidding me?!"

Emma quickly clicked away the online game she was playing and pretended she was working hard, but it was too late. The mayor had already seen it.

Regina walked into the sherrif's office with a raised eyebrow. "Emma Swan, you're the sherrif in this town. Do you really have nothing better to do than playing a stupid video game?!"

"I wasn't…" Emma tried, but one look into the other woman's eyes made her give up. "Okay, I was playing Mario Kart for five minutes, but what else am I supposed to do? Everything is so.. calm right now."

"Seriously?! Of all the games in the world, you're playing Mario Kart?"

Emma raised an eyebrow. "What do you know about games?"

"Did you forget I have a fifteen-years-old son? And may I remind you of the fact that he's your son as well?"

"I suppose you have a…"

"And you don't know what you're supposed to do? Oh I don't know, how about trying to make sure that my evil half won't go on a casual killing spree..?"

Emma sighed. It was so exhausting to be around this woman this early in the morning, when she had only had two cups of coffee. "I don't know where she is, okay? And even if I knew, then what could I possibly do? We are both aware of the fact that the only way to destroy her is… well, we know how. And believe it or not, but the mayority of the town seems to afraid to cause any chaos right now."

"Okay, whatever." Regina sighed. "Anyways, right now I need your help. I mean, the town needs your help. Something is wrong."

"Isn't there always…" Emma started, but she stopped when she saw the look in Regina's eyes. "I mean, what is it that you need me to do?"

"Have you looked outside today?"

"As I matter of fact, I do sometimes glance outside of the window while… working."

"Excellent. Then surely, you know what this is about." Regina gestured to the window and Emma sighed before reluctantly standing up and shoving away the curtains of the office.

She forgot to breathe for a few moments. The truth was, she had not looked outside since she arrived at the sherrif's office and the sky had drastically changed since this morning.

When a few hours ago, it had only been a light glowing and a small spot of green appearing in the distance, right now almost the entire sky was green and glowing. And something was coming. A movement in the sky, in the near distance. Emma could swear she could see it coming closer with the minute.

She stepped back and glanced over at the other woman. "Well, euh, yeah. I suppose I should maybe go take a look at that."

Regina folded her arms. "That may or may not just be the smartest thing I've heard you say tomorrow, Emma." Despite the concern and the obvious annoyance in her voice, Emma could swear that the mayor was trying her best not to smile. She quickly grabbed her third cup of coffee before rushing out of the office.

* * *

"What the hell is the meaning of this?"

Jefferson, formerly known as the Mad Hatter and now the owner of a shop in Storybrooke mostly specialised in creating and selling hats, folded his arms and raised an eyebrow at the young girl who had just brutally bursted into the shop.

The girl, who couldn't be much older than eightteen, rolled her eyes and held out her hand. "Like I said, my name is Heat and I'm your new assistent."

Jefferson didn't shake her hand and kept staring at her in confusion and slight annoyance. "As far as I'm concerned, I have not asked for an assistent."

"Come on, why is everyone so boring? No one in this stupid ass town seems to be looking for an asistent either. You're my last hope. All you need to do is sign this contract." Heat reached in her bag until she eventually found a piece of paper and dropped it on the counter.

Jefferson sighed deeply and stared at her a few more moment before taking a glance at the paper. It was a contract for an internship. His eyes quickly scanned the lines before looking up at the girl again. "You're not from Storybrooke, are you?"

"Nope. I'm a student from New York, and the thing is, we were all supposed to find ourselves an internship outside of the city. So I thought, maybe…"

"And the due date is… today."

"Well… kinda. Yeah."

"And you only started looking for an internship today? Not a very great start, is it?"

"No, it's not at all like that!" Heat picked up one of the hats from the counter, much to Jefferson's dissaproval. "See, I was planning on starting way earlier, but I had a lot of stuff to do for school, mostly, so I kind of forgot about it. It was only today that I remembered, so I decided to pay this nice little town a visit and…"

"Yeah, alright, I get it." He tilted his head and thought about it. "How exactly do you think you could be helpful to me?"

"Well, I'm very good with… selling stuff. And I know a lot about…" Heat looked through the shop. "…hats."

"Really?" Jefferson asked sceptically.

"Yeah, ehm… My grandma used to make hats too."

"Alright…" He rolled his eyes and signed the contract. "Just try not to interrupt me too much when I'm working, okay?"

"Great! Thank you so much!" she smiled at him and looked around the shop. "So, euhm… what should I do now?"

"Anything's fine with me, as long as you don't disturb me."

"Awesome! Then I'll just go… check on the hats."

"That's not really…" Jefferson started, but Heat wasn't listening to him anymore as she walked over to one of the cupboards filled with hats. This girl was impossible. He rolled his eyes and tried to focus on fixing the hat in his hands.

Until a loud thundering noise from outside shook the both of them.

* * *

"What the hell is going on here?!" Emma asked slightly out of breath as she rushed to the crowd that had gathered together at Storybrooke's harbour, followed by Regina. They were all staring at the sky and talking over eachother alarmingly loud.

"Emma! Thank God, there you are." Snow grabbed her daughter's hands, looking panicked.

"Mom, what's happening? What is everyone doing here?"

Emma's own question was answered when she turned her head in the direction the others were looking.

The movement in the sky, which tomorrow had seemed so small and unimportant, was coming closer and closer now. It was a green, glowing tornado, crashing towards Storybrooke.

"What do we do?!" Snow cried out, holding onto Charming tightly.

He stroke his wife's hair in an effort to calm her down and stared at the sky with a big concerned frown. "There's nothing we can do anymore, no one had seen this coming. All we can do… is hope that it won't be the end of us."

"Seriously?! There's a giant tornado coming our way and all you're saying is that we should hope that it won't kill us?!" Regina stared at the Charmings in disbelief and frustration.

"Well, do you have a better idea?!" Emma tried to stay calm. "Come on, we can't just give up! There must be something we can do! After all we've been through, this can't be the end of us!"

Her parents only gave eachother a concerned glance, much to the annoyance of the two other women. "Emma… we don't even know what this is," Charming said. "or who caused it…"  
"What the bloody hell is going on?!" Hook yelled, quickly making his way through the crowd, followed by Belle who kept looking around clutching her bag tightly, like she expected to be attacked any moment.

"Emma, thank god, there you are. Are you okay?" Hook kissed Emma's cheek, but she barely noticed his presence, since the tornado was coming closer every minute.

Regina slightly narrowed her eyes. "You're not exactly helping, guyliner."

"Well, if you know a way to defeat this 'thing' or whatever it is, I'm all ears," he replied sarcastically. Belle stood next to him, the fear written all over her face.

"Emma. We can try magic. Together." Regina grabbed the blonde's arm, bringing her back to earth.

Emma blinked. "Yes… Yes. Magic. Now! Everybody, move!" she yelled and the two women tried to make their way through the crowd.

Killian noticed Belle's discomfort and gently put his arm around her shoulders. "It will be okay, love. Emma is strong, together they can destroy this thing. I'm sure," he said, sounding a lot more confident than he felt.

Snow burried her face in Charming's shoulder and started sobbing quietly. "After all we've done, David, is it really going to end like this?"

"Does anyone know what's happening here?" Jefferson's voice caused all of them to look up. He looked relatively calm given the situation and stood next to a dark-haired girl they had never seen before.

She grabbed her phone to take a picture of the tornado. "So it's true… This town does have magic?"

Jefferson raised an eyebrow. "Heat, if you think that things like this happen everyday you're wrong, this town is usually extremely boring and ordinary. I still don't get why you wanted to do your internship here, actually…"

"Guys, do you not realize how serious this situation is!? We're all dying!" Snow yelled out, immediately embarrassed of her emotional outburst afterwards. "Oh my god I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Shh, it's okay darling, we all get a little emotional in situations like this." Charming reassuringly put his arms around his wife again. Hook rolled his eyes at the couple. Sometimes he wondered where Emma got her badass character from, given the fact that both of her parents were complete wimps.

Meanwhile, Emma and Regina were standing together in front of the crowd, both of their hands aimed at the tornado. Magic had been shooting from their hands for minutes now, but the tornado didn't slow down one bit.

"Jesus Christ, Emma this isn't working!" Regina yelled at her friend over the loud thunder.

"My sister is right. This isn't working." A calm, high-pitched voice behind them made both women abruptly drop their hands.

"Zelena? What are you…" Regina started, still breathless from the effort.

Zelena smiled. "You guys don't have to worry. Nothing bad is going to happen."

"What do you mean..." Emma wiped her forehead and raised an eyebrow.

"Zelena," Regina said sharply. "I swear to God, if you're the one who caused this…"

"But Regina, my dear, don't you want to see Robin again?" Zelena replied happily.

Her sister blinked. "Wait… what the hell are you talking about?"

Zelena stepped closer to the two other women, still smiling. "I know what you're thinking, that it's not possible to ever see Robin and Hades again since they were wiped out from existence. But Hades is the lord of the Underworld, did you really think we can wipe the lord of the Underworld out from existence?"

"Do you mean…" Regina swallowed hard, trying to comprehend this. "You mean that Robin is still…"  
"I don't know where they are, but apparantly, Hades lied about that dagger. They didn't got wipen out from existence, they simply got sent back to the Underworld. He only made up that story to make sure that I wouln't go look for the both of you after he would have sent you there, like he originally planned."

Regina shared a look with Emma, not wanting to believe this crazy story. "Zelena…"

"No, listen, this isn't even the most best part. So you know that in the Underworld, there's this phonecell which allows you to shortly look at the living, right? But we can't send any messages back. Right? Well, apparantly, this dr. Jeckyll is a true genius and a long time ago, he was working on a way to communicate with the death. And don't ask me how, but it worked. Hyde knew about it, ofcourse, and he told my sister… I mean your evil half, he told her about it, just in case. And after he send her a message about Hades and Robin still being alive, she told me. And he told me that there was a way to get him, and a limited number of others, back to the living world. All I had to do was cast a spell that would bring them here." Zelena smiled widely while Regina was still staring at her wide-eyened.. "Sis, don't you get it? We're going to see Robin and Hades back. We're going to see our mother back. We can finally be a family."

Regina slowly shook her head. "This is… complete bullshit. It doesn't make any sense at all…"

"Yeah, don't ask me about the details, I'm not a scientist. But it's a fact that…" Zelena gestured to the green tornado approaching the harbour, now starting to slow down. "this spell will bring back everyone we loved. Aren't you happy?"

Regina finally remembered how to move and roughly grabbed her sister's shoulder. "Zelena, if this is true, do you have any idea what you have just done?!"

"What? What has she done?" Snow yelled out, making her way to her daughter followed by Charming and a bunch of other people. Regina decided not to waste any time answering her.

"Zelena," she hissed. "Why do you think she asked you to cast that spell and not me?! Because my evil half knew that Í wouldn't be stupid enough to believe her!"

"But…"

"Yes, maybe we can get our mother and our boyfriends back, but guess what else?! 'A limited number of other people as well', this means that all the villains we ever defeated may be here any minute, angry and looking for revenge! Can you imagine what it means for Storybrooke if they all team up together?!"

Zelena's eyes widened at the words. "I.. I suppose I didn't think of that…"

"You're such an idiot, Zelena, I don't understand how we could possibly be related!" Regina screamed.

Emma put an hand on her shoulder in an effort to calm her down. "Regina… it doesn't matter anymore. It's too late. Blaming eachother won't solve anything. We need to work altogether now, it's the only way of having any chance to ever get out of this alive."

The tornado stopped, and the green clouds slowly started to fade. All the people in Storybrooke forgot to breathe for a moment when they noticed the group of formerly death people standing in front of them.

Hades. Robin. Neal. August. Graham. But also Hyde. Jeckyll. Cora. Pan. Ingrid. James. Cruella.

Hell was empty, and all the devils were here.

* * *

Only one person wasn't outside. One person was moping the floor. Like he had been doing for 30 years straight.

He sighed deeply and stopped moping for a moment. It was quiet in the alysum. All that could be heard was the crazy mumbling of the prisoners. He was pretty sure he was going crazy as well. Or maybe he already was. How long had it been? He had stopped counting years ago. Everyday was the same anyways.

He had a name, but no one knew him. His story had never been told. The only thing people knew about him, was that he was the man who moped the floor in the mental alysum. Always moping the floor.

 _ **So I hope the first chapter wasn't too dissapointing already xD I'm sorry it might all seem unrealistic and vague, like I said I'm not good with creating deep storylines. Please leave a review if you have any suggestions for a couple you'd like to see in the story, or if you want me to include an OC with your name and short description and I'll see if I can somehow fit it in**_


	2. Chapter 2

_A_ _ **utor's note: First of all my serious apologies for all Zades / OutlawQueen shippers, I'm not trying to break your hearts I swear (That's A &E's job). Second, my apologies for everyone who expected canon ships or a serious story in general (I really tried, I swear) And third, I promise next chapter will include a long Heatferson scene ;))**_

Everyone went silent. The people from Storybrooke kept staring at the people in front of them, trying to figure out whether this was real or not. Zelena grabbed Regina's hand and squeezed. Regina didn't even notice. Her eyes were fixed on the man she loved: Robin. She tried to lock eyes with him and smiled. He flashed a small smile but seemed nervous.

"Neal…" Emma whispered as she grabbed Regina's other hand. This time she did notice and she stared at the blonde's face from the corner of her eye, trying to figure out what she was thinking. Hook did the same thing, his eyes moved from Emma to Neal and back. Belle was still clutching his arm. Charming had his arms still wrapped around Snow protectively. Hades tried to catch Zelena's gaze, but she was staring down in embarassment now that she finally realized what she had done.

Heat tugged on Jefferson's sleeve. "Was that like a magic trick? Because it looked real as fuck," she whispered. "Can you teach me how to do that?"

He mumbled something and pulled his arm away form her.

Most of the villains had an alarmingly angry expression on their face.

Hades slowly stepped forward, a devilish smirk on his face. "Ah, Storybrooke. The Underworld is great, but it's nothing like the bright blue sky you can only find in the living world. How I have missed being… alive."

"Well, enjoy it while you can," Regina snarled and she unexpectedly raised her hand, cutting right through Hades' chest with her deathly magic.

"REGINA, NO!" Zelena screamed. The crowd gasped and backed away in shock.

Hades stumbled back, his eyes widened in shock.

Then he started to laugh.

Regina dropped her hand in confusion. Her magic had not left any sign of damage.

"My dear Regina." Hades stepped forwards, still laughing. "Did you really think it would be this easily to kill me? Because, newsflash, you can't kill any of us, because… we're already death!"

The people behind him bursted out laughing, as if he had just told an extremely funny joke.

"Shit," Regina muttered. Zelena breathed out in relief.

Hyde stepped forwards as well and grinned. "You see, Regina. I wasn't kidding when I said I brought some friends to Storybrooke." His eyes scanned the crowd, as if he was looking for someone.

"You don't have any friends," she replied coldly.

He shook his head, pretending to be hurt. "Damn Regina, I have to admit, I like your other half better."

Emma decided she had to protect Regina from herself before she would say something that could anger the people in front of them and she quickly stepped forward, holding her chin high, determined not to look intimidated. "What do you want?" she asked, not exactly sure who she was adressing.

"Me? Well, right now some alcohol would do," Cruella replied dryly before anyone else had the chance to answer.

"Cruella, my dear friend." The people from Storybrooke diverged silently when Maleficent stepped forward and smiled at the other woman. "Great to see you're back."

"Mal. I've missed you." The two women laughed and hugged eachother. That was the sign for the others to start moving as well. People rushed to embrace their friends and family members they thought they'd never see again. Emma and Regina shared a concerned look when the crowd started moving around them. Emma shouted something about how she would go look for Neal, but in no time, he had found her.

"Emma!"

"Neal!" Emma felt a smile spread across her face at the sight of her old lover and friend. A few seconds they stood in front of eachother awkwardly, before he laughed and wrapped his arms around her.

"Neal… I've missed you," she whispered, burrying her face in his hair. "But how is this possible? I thought you moved on…"  
He smiled and pulled away. "I have no idea what happened. Apparantly, for the spell it didn't matter whether we were in the Underworld or elsewhere…"

"But… you were happy," Emma said quietly, looking down. "Do you even want to be here?"

He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "It doesn't matter what I want right now. With so many villains in the town, the only thing I want is to stay by your side and protect you and your family…"  
"Dad?!" Henry suddenly appeared next to his mother, staring at his father in disbelief.

"Yes, my boy. It's me." Neal's smile grew wider and he spread his arms. Henry ran towards him and hugged him.

"Dad… I've missed you so much," he whispered.

"Henry, let me look at you. You've grown so much since… since the last time I saw you." Neal laughed. "How are you doing, boy?"

Emma watched them with a smile on her face, but she had to blink back a few tears.

* * *

"Regina… I need you to know, I'm really, really sorry. I should have thought this through, I know but… Really, I thought I would be helping you." Zelena carefully looked at her sister, trying to figure out her reaction.

"Leave it. Emma is right, what happened, happened," Regina spoke through gritted teeth. Ofcourse she knew that Zelena had not done this on purpose, and it was partly her own fault as well: If only she would have been the sister Zelena needed, maybe she wouldn't get the crazy idea to run to her evil half instead. But Zelena's stupid act wasn't the only reason for her bad mood right now.

The sisters were standing a bit apart, watching the happy family reunions. The harbour was getting empty: most of the Storybrooke inhabitants were rushing home after realizing what happened and the villains were… gone. Which should probably be something to be concerned about.

"Regina! Zelena! I've been looking for you." The familiar voice awoke both of the sisters from their thoughts.

"Mother?" Regina smiled, instantly forgetting all her worries for a moment as soon as she felt her mother's arms around her. She bit her lip, trying really hard not to cry. "Oh mother… I've missed you so much."

"I know, sweetheart. But I'm here now, and I won't leave again." Cora smiled and turned to her other daughter. "Zelena…"

"Hello mother." Zelena forced a smile but unlike Regina, she didn't really react when Cora hugged her. Regina raised an eyebrow and realised that Zelena still wasn't completely over the fact that their mother had abandoned her so many years ago, even though when they said goodbye in the Underworld, everything had seemed fine. She suddenly felt bad for her sister and mentally swore to be kinder to her and forgive her stupid mistake.

"How are you doing, girls?" Cora stepped back to look at the both of them.

"We're fine," Zelena replied shortly.

"Except for the fact that Zelena just brought all the enemies Storybrooke has ever had, back to life," Regina added with a sarcastic smile before she realized. Damn it, that was her promise to be kinder.

"It's not my fault, okay? I was trying to help you because I still felt bad for Robin's death!" Zelena replied, immediately defensively.

"Well, maybe then you should have considered not letting Hades kill him in the first place."  
"In case you forgot: I lost someone too, to protect yóú! Do you think you're the only one going through a hard time here?!"

Cora raised an eyebrow. "Girls… I thought you two were getting better along last time…"

"We are. I'm sorry…" Regina sighed. "Let's just say we're… working on it."

"Good." Cora smiled slightly. "See, there's someone I'd like to introduce to you."

The sisters shared a confused look. "What do you mean?" Regina asked.

Cora almost seemed nervous for a moment, an emotion which was quite rare on her. "You know I have my heart back, right? So what I'm trying to say… I found someone I love."

"You did…? That's… That's amazing." Regina smiled. This day just got weirder and weirder.

"Yeah.. who is it?" Zelena asked.

Cora turned around. "Warda? Over here."

"Ah, I sensed that… They smell just like you, Cora, but sweeter." A too familiar blonde woman smiled as she put her arm around Cora.

Regina felt her jaw drop. "Mother… please tell me that you do not seriously have a relationship with the Blind Bitch."

"Her name is Warda, Regina, and I appreciate your enthousiasm," Cora said coldly.

"Warda, seriously? Why does that sound like a vaginal fart?"

"Your face looks like a vaginal fart," Warda replied smoothly.

"How would you know bitch, you're blind."

"I don't need my sight to sense the ugliness in your angry, rude personality."

"I must have my mothers' genes then," Regina said in a cold voice, sounding a lot more like Cora than she intended to.

"I'm very happy for you, mother," Zelena interrupted casually and she flashed a smile at Regina, who rolled her eyes.

"Thank you, Zelena."

"I'm happy too," Regina muttered. "I just… need some time to get used to the idea."

The blind witch winked at her. "Maybe something to keep in mind the next time you try to burn me alive, bitch." She kissed Cora full on the lips.

"That wasn't me, it was the Evil Queen," Regina protested before turning her head away in disgust. "Alright, Zelena. I think we should go look for Hades and Robin."

* * *

"So apparantly, they can't die. This is bad news, guys." David looked at his wife and friends with a serious expression on his face.

"No shit," Killian muttered.

As soon as the crowd started moving and the six of them had noticed the former death villains trying to sneak away, they decided to follow them. But now they were standing in an abandoned alley somewhere in Storybrooke and the villains were nowhere to be seen.

Snow took a deep breath. "Emma is right, we can't just sit here and do nothing. There must be a way. We always find a way."

"Yeah, but we've never had to deal with so many villains at the same time." Charming sighed.

"I'd love to discuss this together, guys, but can we maybe go somewhere warmer?" Belle rubbed her bare arms. Killian immediately took off his jacket and handed it to her.

"Here, love. This should keep you warm for now."

She took it gratefully and smiled at him. "Thank you, Killian."

"As much as I love all this nice chatting, I think that finding a way to defeat villians is more like your job, guys," Jefferson commented as they walked back in the direction they came from. "I think Heat and I should go back to the shop, I have three more hats to finish today and…"

Heat poked his arm. "Come on Jeff, don't be a spoilsport. Why would you want to spend all day in that dusty shop when we can defeat villians?"

"Jeff?" He frowned.

"Wait! Guys, maybe there is a way!" Snow exclaimed. "Jefferson, you used to make magical hats, right? Hats that can transport stuff.. and people… to another worlds?"

"I úsed to," he emphasised. "But I haven't done it in years and even if I could, the last thing I feel like doing right now is…"

"Woah woah woah, hold on. Jeff used to make magical hats?! Jeff, why didn't you tell me?" Heat said enthusiastically.

He rolled his eyes. "Welcome, Heat, I run a business specialized in hats and by the way, I used to make magical hats on a daily basis."

"On a daily basis?! Woah… Can you teach me?"

"But Jefferson, what if this is the only way?! If we can get the villains to jump in the magical hat and transport them to the Enchanted Forest, we'll be rid of them forever!"

"With all due respect, Snow White, but there's no way this could ever work," Jefferson said. "First of all, last time I tried I could only manage to teleport a small apple between worlds. Second, even if it would work, then how exactly are you planning on tricking all of them into jumping in that stupid hat?"

"Do you know what's stupid? The fact that you refuse to sell magical hats. Do you have any idea how much money we could make with that?"

"'We', Heat?"

"I didn't think I'd ever say this, Jefferson, but Snow has a point," Killian commented. "Last time you tried, we were under the curse. Right now, there is magic. Don't you think we should give it a try?"

They had arrived at the shopping center. Jefferson stopped.

"I'm sorry, guys, but defeating villains isn't my thing," he said. "Heat, are you coming?" With these words he headed back in the direction of the shop.

Heat shared a look with the Charmings. "I should've done my internship somewhere else. This town is awesome, but this guy is boring as fuck."

"Heat, wait!" Snow said. "Maybe you can talk to him."

"What? Me?" Heat laughed. "Like he would ever listen to me, this guy is stubborn as…"

"I know, but so are you. And Heat, I know this might sound weird, but I feel like if he would listen to anyone, it would be you. Do you think there's anyone else in this town who could possibly call him Jeff and get away with it?"

"Euh… I suppose not."

"Please give it a try, okay? This may or may not be the only way to save the town." Snow smiled at the girl. Heat thought about it for a few seconds and then nodded.

"Alright, I'll try. It was nice to meet you, Snow. See you guys around!" She quickly left in the direction Jefferson went.

"Snow, you know I always support you, no matter what," Charming said as soon as Heat was gone. "But I'm afraid he is right. Magic can't solve this. But maybe science can."

"What are you saying, David?"

"I'm saying that we need to pay this asshole Whale a visit." He paused for a moment. "And, unfortunately, Jeckyll."

"What?!" Belle frowned. "No! That guy is crazy."

""Yeah mate, what the hell? He literally tried to kill Belle yesterday!" Killian added. "Next time I see him, I'll slam a wooden stake through his heart like a bloody vampire, and I don't care whether he dies or not, as long as he suffers."

"Woah, Killian. Are you alright?" Snow asked concerned.

"I'm fine, but you guys won't be if you go to that freak for help!"

"Believe me Killian, I hate this just as much as you do. But you have seen that magic can't kill him and the chance of Jefferson succeeding with that hat is about zero," Charming said. "You know how much Jeckyll and Whale can accomplish together. We need to try."

"He is right, Killian," Snow agreed.

Killian rolled his eyes. "Like you guys would ever disagree about something. Fine, I'm coming with you. But Belle… I need to bring you somewhere safe."

"What?! No! First Rumple and now you? Why does everyone think I need protection?!" Belle protested.

"It's just not safe for you out here, love. Don't forget that there's a lot of villains in this town right now, and a lot of these villains have Rumple as their enemy. Kidnapping the woman he loves would just be a very easy way for them to get what they want."

She laughed sarcastically. "Like he would care."

"In that case, it would be even worse for you. If Rumple doesn't care for you indeed, you'd be at their mercy."

"Ugh. Alright…" Belle sighed. "But I'm not staying with Rumple. Do you think I could maybe live with you and Emma for a while? Just until I have found something better?"

"We're not exactly… living together yet." Killian awkwardly tried to avoid the questioning looks of the Charmings. "But anyways, I suppose I do have a guest room in my house."

* * *

"So, our mother and the Blind Bitch? Do you believe it?"

Zelena shrugged. "I'm happy for her."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I got that already. But of all people in the Underworld? Why her?!"

"You've made quite a lot of enemies, Regina. You can't blame our mother for the fact that her girlfriend just happens to be one of them."

"For the last time, that wasn't me… It was the Evil Queen."

"It's easy, isn't it? Now that you ripped yourself in half, you can just blame her for all your bad actions in the past. Maybe I should try it as well."

Regina stopped walking. "What are you trying to say, Zelena?"

Her sister sighed. "Leave it. I'm tired of our pointless arguments, Regina. Anyways, I think that we've found who we were looking for." She nodded in the direction of two men talking by the water.

Regina felt her breath hitch in her throat. She would recognize Robin from a mile distance. She instinctively reached for Zelena's hand and grabbed it tightly as they slowly walked over to them.

"I don't care what you feel, Robin. We need to tell them, the sooner we've done it, the sooner it's over," they heard Hades say as they got closer.

"Tell who, what?" Zelena asked. The two men immediately turned around.

"Zelena…" Hades reached out to grab her hand, but she flinched and didn't look at him.

He sighed. "I get that you're still angry at me…"

"Not now, Hades," she replied quietly.

"Robin…" Regina smiled and wrapped her arms around him. "I can't believe you're real…"

She kissed him and he kissed back, but something felt different. She pulled back to look at him and raised an eyebrow. "Robin, what's wrong?"

Robin shared a look with Hades. "Nothing, baby. I'm just happy to see you, that's all."

Regina stepped back and folded her arms. "What are you guys not telling us?"

"It's nothing, really. Nothing important…" Hades carefully avoided everyone's gaze.

"Nothing important? Well, it was pretty important to me." Robin frowned.

"Guys, what the hell is going on?!"

"Robin. Tell me," Regina demanded.

"Well… we… After we got both sent back to the Underworld, Hades and I… spent quite some time together." Robin shared a nervous look with Hades, who rolled his eyes.

"And?" Regina asked impatiently.

"Hades?" Zelena tried.

"We slept together, alright?!" Hades put his hands up in defense. "But it didn't… mean.. anything. We were drunk."

"YOU DID WHAT?!" Regina screamed.

Zelena closed her eyes. "This entire day is a fucking acid dream."

"It didn't mean anything, okay!" Hades yelled back. "At least not to me, I'm not sure about Robin."

"Robin! This guy literally tried to wipe you out from existence!"

"It's not my fault, okay! He was the one who kept filling my glass and then he started kissing me!"

"That's not true! You randomly started touching my…"

"Okay, that's enough! I don't want to hear!" Regina took a deep breath. "Jesus Christ…"

"So… Are you guys like, gay now?" Zelena asked bluntly.

"No," Hades replied immediately. "Not… really."

"I think," Robin added.

"Great. Absolutely fantastic. Just when I thought this day couldn't get any better," Regina spoke through gritted teeth.

"It was the alcohol, okay? I thought he was you, Regina," Robin tried.

"Great, so now you're insulting me?"

"What do you mean, insulting yóú? Bitch, have you seen my hair?" Hades demonstrated it by lighting his hair on fire.

"See! Come on, how could I possibly not be attrackted to this! Zelena, I'm sure you understand." Robin looked at Zelena hopefully.

"Are you really asking hér opinion now? I mean, she had a baby with yóú," Hades commented with disgust in his voice.

"Yes, and after that night, I'm sure you understand why, mate!"

"Wait, so you're saying that everyone here has slept with my boyfriend at one point?" Regina groaned. "Robin, excuse me but, this makes you a fucking manwhore."

"Hey, that's unfair. Both of the times, I thought it was you."

"Yeah, that's an easy way to talk yourself out of it, mate. That would be like me saying that I thought you were Zelena."

"But you can't say that, bitch, because we never slept together," Zelena said and she quietly added: "Thank god we didn't."

"What? The two of you never slept together?" Robin started to laugh. "And you just kept bragging to me about how you guys had it going all night long?"

"Shut up." Hades glared.

"Wait, are you saying that I had sex with your girlfriend why you didn't? This is priceless!"

"Jesus Christ, can you all just shut up, please?!" Regina closed her eyes in annoyance. "I don't want to hear any more words about eachother's sex skills now, understood? You know what, fine, go have a fucking threesome, just leave me out of it."

Robin watched her walk away. "It's moments like this why I'm realize I'm not fully gay."

"A threesome sounds good?" Hades tried hopefully.

Zelena sighed deeply and left without saying another word.

* * *

"I knew you would come back."

Mr. Hyde grinned and turned around to see her. It was dark in the forest. He could barely see her face, but he could hear she was smiling.

"Only because I knew you would find a way to convince your sister to cast that spell." He took her hand and gently kissed her fingertips. "I owe it all to you, my lady."

The Evil Queen laughed softly. "It was the only way. You and Jeckyll had to die to get the serum to the Underworld, allowing us to communicate with you. It was the only way to get all the villains to Storybrooke."

"And so it appears my useless other half isn't that useless after all." He tilted his head, trying to distinguish her face in the darkness. "There's one thing I still don't get. You could've easily cast that spell yourself. Why did you make Zelena do it?"

"Isn't it obvious?" The Queen smirked. "This way, Regina would get so mad at her sister it would only destroy their already ruined relationship further. And eventually, Zelena will come to me, looking for the sister she needs. If we can get her to join us, she'll just be another poweful ally."

"See… this is why you're my partner in crime." The moon crept through the trees, finally allowing him to see her face. He stepped closer to her and she held her breath for a moment. "Ready to cause some chaos?" He whispered.

She smirked. "You know I am."

He grabbed her hand. "Then come with me. They're waiting for us."

* * *

"A double martini, please."

"Had a rough day?" Emma looked at Regina, who sat down on the bar stool next to her at Granny's.

"Kinda." The brunette sighed.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really. What about you? How was your reunion with Neal?"

"It was… weird." Emma shrugged. "I don't know how to explain. It was amazing to see him again, but it was painful to watch him seeing Henry again and realizing how they missed all those years together, you know?"

"Yes…" Regina nodded and took a sip from her drink.

"And also… I know that Henry likes Hook and stuff, but when he saw me and Neal talking I could tell just from the look on his face that… I mean, ofcourse a child would want his parents to be together, right? That's normal."  
"Henry is a big kid, Emma. He'll understand." She paused for a moment. "Or do you still have feelings for him?"

"No, not really. It was just like seeing a long lost friend again."

"And… Hook?"

"What about him?"

"How is he dealing with all of this, you seeing the father of your kid again and stuff?"

"I don't know… Haven't talked to him a lot lately." Emma gestured for Granny to come over. "The same as her, please."

"But I thought you wanted him to move in with you…?"

"At the moment, I did. Right now? I don't know what I want anymore." Emma took a big sip from her drink. "I don't even have time for all this stupid love drama. I have a town to protect from a bunch of angry villains, why also trying to figure out why I have this visions about my death."

Regina watched her from the corner of her eye. "You shouldn't rush things if you're not hundred percent ready for it."  
Emma laughed slightly. "You're the first to say it. My parents keep saying that they want me to be happy and that I have to stop being so scared of love. It's what everyone says."

"Well, then don't listening to everyone. The only one you should listen to is yourself." Regina stared down at her almost empty glass.

"But that's the thing. I don't know what I would be telling myself." Emma sighed.

"Did you know that the Underworld turns people gay?" Regina stated casually.

"Wait, what? Who is gay?"

"Everyone. My mother, Hades… Robin…"  
"Whát? Robin is gay?!"

"Yup." Regina made a face. "With Hades."

"No way!" Emma tried her best not to burst out laughing. "Oh my god… I mean, I'm sorry, that must be hard for you."

Regina shrugged. "Right now it's just confusing. It's all too much to deal with for one day…"

Emma looked at her. "Whatever he thinks is his sexuality right now, I'm sure that what he for you felt is real… or was."

"Maybe. Whatever." She finished her drink with one big sip.

The door burst open. "Emma? Is that you?"

Emma turned around and her eyes widened. "Graham? What the…"

The former huntsman walked in and smiled. "Emma… I've been looking for you everywhere. I just wanted to tell you that…" he grabbed her hand. "I love you, Emma."

Emma just stared at him wide-eyened.

Regina watched them with a raised eyebrow. "Damn Emma, you really do have the guys all chasing after you, don't you?"

"Now that I'm back alive, I finally have my heart back, Emma, and all I want to tell you is that…" He leaned forward and kissed her hand. "I love you so much, Emma. It's like with you, I feel complete again."

Emma shook her head, trying to figure out what was happening. "Graham, look, I really think you're a nice guy and such, but you're drunk and I just… I'm in a relationship…"

"Are you? But he's not here right now, is he?" Graham smiled at her and gently kissed her cheek. Emma made a face and pushed him away. "Graham…"

"Oh really, isn't he?" Regina suddenly stood up and wrapped her arm around a completely stunned Emma.

Graham frowned. "Wait, what? Last time the two of you were basically killing eachother!"

"Well, a lot has changed," Regina replied coldly. "Guess what? I'm her girlfriend. Yes, that's right, we're gay together. So unless you're up for a threesome, I would kindly ask you to leave."

Emma choked on her drink and stared at Regina with wide, shocked eyes, a blush creeping over her face.

"I… I don't understand," Graham stuttered.

"No, that's because you're drunk. If you want to know more about gay people, I suggest you go talk to my mother Cora Mills and Warda, the blind bitch, because I'm sure they'd be more than happy to explain. Let's go Emma."

With these words, Regina linked her arm with Emma's and together they left the dining room, leaving a very speechless and confused Graham.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Autor's note: First of all I'm sorry about the fact that this chapter is waaay too long (I know I'm terrible at keeping it short) and second I'm so sorry to all Rumbelle shippers, I really didn't want to break any more hearts that's supposed to be A &E's job  
**_

"Seriously? You peasants are starting the party without us?"

Everyone in the room went silent when the door slammed open and the Evil Queen entered the room, a smirk playing around her lips, closely followed by mr. Hyde.

"Quite honestly, I don't think we can really talk about a 'party' as long as we're not here," the last one commented.

Cruella rolled her eyes. "Darlings, as much as I hate to crack your egos, we were perfectly managing to have fun without you."

The Queen folded her arms and looked around the room with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah, I can totally see you guys are having a great time."

The villains of Storybrooke were gathered together in one of the large houses just outside Storybrooke Hades had claimed as 'his'. He himself was standing in front of the fireplace, facing the rest of the group, giving off the impression that he found himself quite important. The three Queens of Darkness were sitting on one couch, so closely together that Cruella was practically sitting on Ursula's lap and smoking a cigarette, much to the annoyance of Ingrid, who was sitting in the big chair next to the three women and kept wiping the smoke out of her face. It was pretty obvious that Cruella was doing it on purpose. Peter Pan was sitting on the other big chair, watching the other people in the room like a predator. His loyal subject Felix was standing next to the chair, looking like he would kill anyone who dared lay one finger on his leader and boyfriend. Cora and Warda were sharing one armchair, Warda had her legs wrapped over Cora's while the other woman was slowly caressing her hair.

"You are late," Hades stated calmly.

"Don't you know? Queens are always late." The Queen walked over to James, who had lain down on the only other couch. "Move, loser."

"For you, always." James winked and sighed deeply before slowly sitting up, like it was an enormous effort to make. She rolled her eyes and sat down next to him. Hyde sat down on her other side.

James glanced over at Ingrid. "Your loneliness really makes you stand out, beauty. Are you sure you don't need a handsome man to warm you up?"

"Are you sure you need your tongue?" Ingrid glared at him so coldly, for a moment it was like she was about to freeze him in place, but Hades stepped forward. "No! This is not happening. I didn't bring so many villains to Storybrooke just so that we could all go around killing eachother. We have a mission, remember?"

"Yeah, about that!" Cruella shouted from the other end of the room. "I thought we were going to kill some people, but now we're all just sitting together like a bunch of lame old people."

Hades sighed irritatably. "I called for this meeting simply so that we could possibly discuss our ideas together. So, does anyone have an idea of how the best and most painful way to destroy this town?"

"Oh I don't know, we can simply kill everyone?" Cora rolled her eyes. "It's not hard. One time, I killed entire villages in one hour, all by myself."

Hades rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I already figured that, miller's daughter. The thing is: I could kill everyone by myself, don't need you for that. So unless you have something useful to say…"

Warda abruptly stood up, creating a fireball in my hand. "Don't talk about my girlfriend like that."

"Oooh, bitchfight!" Cruella screamed.

Ursula covered her mouth laughing. "And that's enough alcohol for today."

"Shh, baby." Cora took Warda's arm, pulling her back to the chair. "He's not worth it."

Pan suddenly stood up and marched towards the fireplace, immediately followed by Felix. "And that's enough. Are we actually going to make a plan or is it just all of you idiots bitching eachother out? Because if that's the case, I have more useful stuff to do."

Hades narrowed his eyes. "Thanks a lot, Pan, but I know perfectly well how to shut down idiots by myself."

"I can create a barrier of ice around this town again so that no one is able to leave," Ingrid stated calmly as soon as everyone went quiet.

"See? This is useful information. Thanks, Ingrid."

"So then the rest of us just… go around killing everyone?" Maleficent rolled her eyes. "I knew this meeting would be a waste of my time."

"Wait, hold on. Hades is right about one thing, if you guys kill everyone, there will be no one left to rule over," Hyde commented. "And since Storybrooke is mine now, then it's no fun for me to rule this town anymore."

"Exactly. If killing everyone was so much fun, do you think Hyde and I wouldn't have done it already?" The Evil Queen agreed. "No, all we need to do is cause chaos, not kill everyone, while making sure that the Storybrooke peasants won't find a way to defeat us."

"Yeah, well, but I don't want Regina or Zelena to get hurt," Cora said. "To be honest, I couldn't care less for this whole plan of you, Hades."

"Jesus christ, did you idiots forget we made a deal?!" Hades said impatiently. "I would leave the people y'all love alone and help y'all get out of the Underworld, and in exchange for that, áll of you were supposed to help me with my plan to dominate Storybrooke."

"Excuse me, Hades, but we help yóú to dominate Storybrooke?" Hyde stood up. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that without me, you would still be stuck in the Underworld. Also, did you forget the fact that Rumplestiltskin gave me Storybrooke? If anyone was to rule over Storybrooke, it should be me."

"Ahem. Who helped you out of your cell again?"

"Fine, with a little bit of help from the Evil Queen over here."

"Darling, did you forget who cast the curse that created Storybrooke in the first place?" She looked up at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Bitch, without me you wouldn't even exist," Cora said dryly. "I'm the one who made you a queen, don't forget that."

Warda laughed. "Burn."

The Evil Queen narrowed her eyes. "Shut up, Warda, you annoy me already. And did you know that your name sounds like a vaginal fart?"

"Haven't I already told you that your face looks like one?"

Peter Pan rolled his eyes in frustration. "That's it, Felix, we're wasting our time. You know what? We'll come back when you all have come up with a proper plan."

"Wait!" Hades yelled. "Who helped Regina to create the curse in the first place?"

"It wasn't Regina, bitch, it was me," The Queen protested.

"Well I gave it to her… I mean you," Maleficent said after a moment of silence.

James laughed. "Y'all are forgetting that if I wouldn't be noble enough to die, Charming and Snow probably wouldn't have met and I'm sure that we wouldn't have annoyed you so much that you'd want us to die. So then there would also be no curse in the first place."

The Queen gave him a weird look. "Congratulations James, on creating a theory that made absolutely no sense. First of all, you would've annoyed me even more than Charming so I would have killed you off before I'd even think of creating a curse."

"See! Then there would've been no curse, so no Storybrooke!"

"Oh my god, you guys are so incredibly stupid!" Hades yelled impatiently. "It's Rumplestiltskin, idiot. He was the one to get Regina to create the curse. He created Storybrooke. If we want victory, we need him!"

"I don't want victory, I just want gin," Cruella said dryly.

"Fine. Who wants revenge?"

It was silent for a few moments.

Maleficent stood up. "Alright. The girls and I are in."

"Oh, are we?" Cruella mumbled.

"I want revenge," Pan said firmly. "But I want to kill Rumplestiltskin. That bastard killed me twice."

"You want your own son to die? Talk about bad parenting." Cora shook her head.

"Says the woman who abandoned her own daughter and sent ther other daughter on a dark path because of her own desperation for attention and power."

"Hey, that's not fair. I didn't have my heart."

"Exactly. And now you do, baby, so it's alright." Warda smiled and kissed her girlfriend.

Ingrid rolled her eyes. "How sickeningly sweet."

"You're just jealous."

Hyde stepped forward. "I'm in, under one condition. The Queen and I get Storybrooke."

Hades sighed deeply. "You know what? We'll cut Storybrooke in three pieces. I get one third, the two of you get the other and the last part.. Well, we'll let the other idiots fight over that, alright?"

The Queen stood next to Hyde. "We want the part with the harbour in it."

"Fine. You get the harbour, we won't hurt Cora's daughters, Pan gets to kill Rumplestiltskin, any more demands?"

"And Lily. No one touches Lily." Mal narrowed her eyes.

"N-no, ofcourse not," Hades quickly replied, a little frightened by the stories about her turning into a dragon.

"You won't hurt Emma either," Ingrid said firmly. "And after you guys are done with your stupid plan, I want you to let Emma and me leave to go look for Elsa."

Hades thought about it for a moment. "Fine, but if she refuses to come with you, I'm not responsible."

"I'll find a way. If I kill the rest of her family, I'll be her only one she has left."

"No, I want to be the one to kill my idiot twin brother," James added.

"Not a problem. Anything else?"

"Yes, over here." Cruella raised her hand. "I want a villa of my own, bigger than my house back in New York used to be, and in my backyard I want a fontain that spawns unlimited gin."

"Yeah, now that we're talking, I'd like you to deliver all of the children in the town to me so that I can use them for my soup," Warda added to the list in a serious voice.

Cora smiled. "That's my violent girl."

"I don't care who owns the harbour. I want unlimited acces to the sea, to visit my father," Ursula added.

"Jesus christ, you guys are impossible! We'll fight about all of this later, alright? First of all we need to get a way to get Rumplestiltskin to join us."

The Queen laughed. "How is this even a question? We know exactly what is the only way to get him to participate, don't we?"

Cruella frowned. "I suppose we can try and seduce him."

"Nah, already tried that and if he doesn't want me, he surely doesn't want you, fuzzy. No, we have to use the only thing he cares about... Belle."

* * *

"Well, well, what a lovely surprise! The Charming dreamduo, the less charming Captain and his Swan, and the ex-Evil Queen who now redeemed herself!" Dr. Whale folded his arms and watched the four people in front of him. "What can I do for you?"

"The Evil Queen was never me," Regina mumbled quietly.

Charming tried to look past the scientist, but he was blocking his way. "We're sorry to interrupt you, but is dr. Jeckyll with you?"

Whale's fake smile started to fade a little. "Why would he be with me? It's not like we're around eachother 24/7."

"I'm here, d-did anyone call my name?" The nervous voice of the other doctor came from inside of the small labaratorium Whale and Jeckyll were using together now. Killian immediately clenched his fistst, ready to attack. Emma sensed his anger and put her hands on his shoulders, trying to calm him down. Whale sighed.

"Thank you, Jeckyll, that really worked out great."

Charming frowned, sensing the unusuality. "Why would we not be supposed to know where he is?"

The two doctors shared a look. Whale sighed. "David, I'm sure you're aware of the fact that in a small town like this, rumours spread like wildfire. Did you honestly think everyone wouldn't already have heard about what happened with him and Belle? I euh, kind of offered the doctor hostage in my house. To keep him safe."

"Really? That's… kind of you, Whale." Charming shared a look with Snow and tried to keep the surprise out of his voice. "Just because he's your working partner now?"

"Yeah, well… and also my friend."

"Yes, t-that's true. Just friends," Jeckyll nodded, but the colour on his cheeks told a whole different story.

"Just friends, hm. Two creepy scientist nerd friends who somehow found love between the medicals. I see." Regina rolled her eyes. "So the Underworld gayness has affected you as well. Whatever, let's get to the point. As much as I hate to admit, we need your help."

"I figured that. What exactly do you need?" Whale tried to keep a straight face despite the comment about the Underworld gayness.

Emma stepped forward. "I'm sure the two of you are aware of the villains threatening Storybrooke right now, and being scientists, I'm also sure that you've heard of the fact that, since they're already death, we can't simply kill them. But we were thinking, if not with magic, then maybe with science…?" She asked hopefully.

The two men shared a look. "You want us to create a serum that will kill the villains?" Whale repeated. "You mean, all of them?"

"No, I thought maybe let one of two murderers alive," Regina said sarcastically. "Yes. All of them."

"It doesn't necessarily have to be murder, though," Snow added quietly. "If you can find a way to rob them from their powers so that we can put them in prison for the rest of their lives, that would be perfect."

Regina turned to the other woman with a raised eyebrow. "Are you serious? They think that once they're in prison, they'll just give up, just like that?"

"I don't know, but I just thought maybe murder isn't the way…"

"Because they won't find a way to communicate with eachother from inside of there? They'll just peacefully accept their loss and not even look for a way out?"

"I'm only saying…"

"That's enough, Regina. Please don't talk to my wife like that," Charming said with a hint of warning in his voice.

"My sincere apologies." Regina rolled her eyes.

"We won't kill Hyde." Dr. Whale looked determined. "You guys will have to find another way to deal with him, because as far as I'm concerned, he and Jeckyll might still share that connection which means that if one of them dies, the other will die as well. About the others…" He looked at his partner again. "I suppose we can try."

Jeckyll nodded, his face still red from embarassment. "Yes, I s-suppose. I mean if only we could find a way to immobilate them for a couple of minutes…"

"Exactly! All we have to do is mix a couple of drugs together, enough to cause them to pass out, and then somehow find a way to get that inside of them…." Whale continued.

"Yes! And then maybe… someone else could separate their head from their bodies, and if that doesn't kill them it should at least distract them long enough to chain them up and sink them to the bottom of the sea. I doubt if any of them can ever get back to Storybrooke from there."

"This guy makes me want to kill him more and more every minute," Hook mumbled.

Regina sighed. "You smartasses are forgetting one simple thing: Emma and I can simply use our magic to cause them to pass out. This was a waste of them. I'm out." She turned around to leave.

"Wait!" Whale said. "I might know one thing that could possibly kill them."

"What is it?" Regina asked impatiently.

"So they came back from the death, right? Well, how do you kill death people? With water from the River of Lost Souls."

It went silent for a few seconds.

"This is… actually a great idea," Emma mumbled a bit surprised.

"It is, but… That would mean we have to go back to the Underworld and collect a lot of water from the River of Lost Souls, just in case," David said. "Okay let's say this could possibly work, then how do we get down there and back? Since the former Lord of the Underworld is here now, I don't think we can get there the same way we did last time."

"I might know a way," Regina said. Zelena casted this spell to get everyone here, right? If only I could find a way to get her to do that again…"

David shook his head. "Do you think she won't know what we're up to? And besides, no matter how powerful her magic, there's no way she casted a spell like that all by herself. She must have got some help from Hades or the Evil Queen, maybe both, and they definitely won't help us."

"They might not. But maybe Gold can…"

"Alright, you guys figure out a way to get in the Underworld and we'll see what we can do, alright? But…" Whale bit his lip nervously. "We want something in return."  
"Are you bloody serious, mate?!" Hook said angrily and Emma had to hold him back from attacking the doctors. "You want to make deals now, like the crocodile?! Fine, how about this: You guys help us and in return I won't kill Jeckyll?"

"Killian, easy, mate," David warned.

"Calm down! All I'm asking is if you guys could like, not tell anyone about me and Jeckyll…?" Whale asked carefully.

"Ofcourse we won't tell anyone!" Snow exclaimed. "I would never do that."

"Because you're so good with secrets," Regina mumbled.

"Fine. We promise, okay? Thanks a lot, guys. Keep me updated." David quickly pushed Killian out of the door and gestured for the rest to follow him.

* * *

"Zelena. We need to talk."

Zelena sighed. "Seriously? You've brought me all the way to this lame ass library just to talk?"

"What else did you expect? That I was going to read something for you?" The Lord of the Underworld replied. He quickly turned around when he heard a quiet chuckle behind him. He narrowed his eyes, but the library was empty, apart from a brown-haired girl who looked to absorbed in her book to pay any attention to the couple.

"I didn't know the Lord of the Underworld likes to spend his time reading," Zelena replied sarcastically.

Hades sighed. "Zelena, please. Listen to me, okay?"

"Alright." She folded her arms.

"I need you to know, the thing with Robin? It really didn't mean anything to me, I swear. We were drunk. I'm not gay. You're the only one I love… the only one I have ever loved."  
She swallowed hard. "That's what you said last time, and then it appeared that you chose your power over me after all. Apparantly, you didn't love me enough to spare the life of my sister," she said in a bitter voice.  
"I know I have made mistakes. You have all right to be angry at me."

"Good."

"Zelena…"

"I couldn't care less about your stupid one-night-stand, okay? But what I do care about is that you always keep lying to me, about everything. How can I ever trust you again? How would I know that you're not again planning to take over Storybrooke?!"

"I am terribly sorry about what I tried to do to your sister, I really am. And I won't lie to you every again, Zelena," he promised.

"So you're not having secret meetings in your stupid villa with the other villians, trying to decide over the fate of Storybrooke…?"

"I don't know where you got that crazy idea, Zelena, but none of it is true," he lied.

Zelena rolled her eyes. She wasn't as stupid as everyone thought she was, she had seen it herself, when she was flying over the house and she saw a bunch of too familiar people walk out of it, half of them too drunk to walk straight anymore.

"Whatever, Hades. You said that I was all you wanted, but you lied. And then you killed my sister's boyfriend and tried to kill her as well. I just need some time, okay?"

"But Zelena… I love you. You are all I want, really." He tried to hug her, but she stepped back. He thought he heard someone laugh, but when he looked around the library, apart from the other girl there was no one else.

"Leave me alone, Hades. Talk to me again when you've sent your friends back to the Underworld." With those words, she turned around and left the library.

Hades sighed and sat down in one of the armchairs.

"Are you seriously telling me that you know how to escape the Underworld, but you don't know how to keep your girl with you?"

"What the hell?!" Hades stared at the girl, who had now dropped her book and smirked mockingly at him. He didn't know whether to be angry or embarassed. "Were you eavesdropping our conversation?"

"Can you really blame me? You were having an argument in a public library, it was way too interesting to not listen."

Hades frowned. "So? It's rude."

"So is killing your girlfriend's sister and sleeping with her boyfriend."

"I suppose you have a point." He sighed. "Do I know you?"

"Don't think so. My name is Angellina, but everyone calls me Angi."

He frowned. Hadn't he heard that name somewhere before? He couldn't remember. "Euh, nice to meet you, I guess. Well, you already know my name."

"You're the Lord of the Underworld, how could I possibly not have heard of you?"

"Well... I don't think I have heard of you. Have I?"

Angi laughed. "I suppose you should have, since you spy on the people in Storybrooke on a daily basis from underneath the earth."

"I don't 'spy on people' and I only know the people that are relevant or interesting."

She tilted her head. "Are you saying I'm interesting?"

"No, you're just… confusing." Her directness had kind of caught him off guard, something that didn't happen to the Lord of the Underworld quite often.

"Says the man who tells his girlfriend he would never lie to her, and then sneaks off to discuss the future of Storybrooke with a bunch of dangerous mental alysum patients."

Hades rolled his eyes. "Alright, I get it, you think I'm an idiot. Well then tell me, Angi, how am I supposed to solve this according to you?"

"Oh I don't know, she's your girlfriend, not mine." Angi shrugged. "But here's one smart piece of advice: Stop lying to her. She's not as stupid as you think she is, Hades. She knows exactly when you're lying to her, and after your actions lately, I'm not surprised that she doesn't trust you anymore."

"Are you saying I should do as she says and send everyone back to the Underworld?" He frowned. "Without them I'm basically powerless here, and if she still doesn't trust me after that, it would all be for nothing."

"Yeah, can you really blame her? And it wouldn't be for nothing, because if you give her a good reason to trust you, there's a big chance she will stay with you. Despite everything you did, this woman obviously still loves you. You should be thankful for that."

"Yeah… if you bring it like that…" He nodded slowly. "So that's what you're saying? I can either have her or my revenge on Storybrooke, but not both?"

"That's not exactly how it works, Hades. All I'm saying is that you should at least be honest with her. If you value your revenge more than her, then tell her, because that's the least she deserves. And if you want to try things again with her, but without sending your friends back down there, tell her that."

"There's no way she would stay with me after that…"

"That's up to her. If she really loves you, she might be okay with it, who knows? All she cares about is that you're honest with her. How do you expect to have a relationship if you can't even tell her the truth?"

He looked at her curiously. "You know a lot of relationships, do you have a boyfriend?"

She shook her head.

"How is that possible? You're beautiful," he said without thinking.

She stared at him for a few seconds before looking down shyly. "Thank you, I guess."

He quickly stood up. "I should go… think about what you said, and stuff…"

"Yeah… I suppose I should go as well, I have to work tomorrow." She put the book in her bag and stood up as well. For a few seconds, they awkardly stared at eachother.

"I'll see you around," Hades said abruptly before rushing to the exit.

"Bye, Hades."

* * *

Belle sat curled up in one of the armchairs in Killian's small apartment. She was holding a book, but she couldn't concentrate on the words. Her thoughts kept constantly floating back to her friends, somewhere out in the town talking to Whale and Jeckyll. Shouldn't they have been home already? She had repreatedly told Killian not to do stupid things, but what if he would lose his temper? Last time that Jeckyll guy had almost killed her, who knew what else he could do?

"Jesus… I really need to stop worrying over every damn thing…" She mumbled to herself.

"Well, well! Look who's finally getting some self-awareness." A cold, mocking voice caused her to almost drop the book in shock.

"Maleficent." She quickly stood up, trying not to show fair. "This is Killians appartment. Get out."

"But ofcourse, my darling, we've made all this effort to simply let you tell us to leave!" Another woman entered the room with an amused smile, standing next to Maleficent.

"And Cruella." Belle sighed. "Do I really look this intimidating you had to bring your friends, Maleficent?" she added when Ursula stood next to the dragon's other side.

The Sea Witch smiled. "You know what they say, preparation is key."

"I've never heard anyone say that, but alright."

Maleficent stepped further into the room and Belle involuntarily backed away a little. "I'm surprised, Belle, that the Dark One would leave his precious wife here all alone, in the house of his enemy, without any protection? Troubles in paradise?"

"I don't need his protection," Belle mumbled, clutching the book tightly like it was her only weapon. "Not like it's any of your business."

Cruella laughed hard. "Now darling, is that any way to speak to your guests?"

Maleficent took a look around the room before fixing her eyes back on the brunette. "I see, you have your friends to protect you. But where are they now, hm?"

Belle rolled her eyes. "What do you want from me?"

Maleficent smiled. "Do we really need to ask? I know you like to think you're a big girl, but there's nothing you have to offer us. The Dark One, on the other hand…"

"Aha. So you're kidnapping me, again? Seriously?"

Ursula smiled. "It worked perfectly fine last time, and so it will now." She suddenly wrapped her tentacles around Belle, lifting her up in the air. Belle tried to scream, but the witch covered her mouth with one of the tentacles.

Cruella laughed hoarsely. "Darling, I suggest you bring your tentacles to the bedroom next time." She winked.

Maleficent rolled her eyes. "Oh please, could you guys stop being gay for one second? Let's go."

"You're not going anywhere."

She turned around. Only a second too late to prevent Killian from smacking her in the face with his hook, with so much anger and strength it caused her do drop to the floor.

"Killian!" Belle breathed out in relief when Ursula loosened the tentacles in her shock and surprise.

"Shit," Cruella muttered. "Darling, we have to get out of here!"

"Not so fast, lady." Killian blocked her path and raised his hook to hit again, but Ursula smacked him against the wall with her tentacles.

"Cru, get the girl and get out!" she yelled.

Cruella turned around to grab Belle, but the brunette was prepared and smacked the other woman against her head with the book she was holding. She stepped back, holding onto the book shelf, stunned by her own action.

Killian stumbled up and glared at Ursula. "You have three seconds to get you and your bitches away from here, or I'll tear your skin to pieces."

"Fuck." The Witch looked from Killian to Belle and quickly made her decission. She wrapped her tentacles around Maleficent and Cruella and jumped out of the window, taking both women with her.

For a moment, Killian and Belle just stared at eachother, out of breath. He quickly walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. She hugged him back shakily.

"Wow, that was… badass." He smiled. "Belle, are you alright?"

She nodded and took a deep breath. "I… I think so…. Thank you, Killian. If you wouldn't have been there, who knows what would've happened…"

He pulled back to look at her. "Nothing would've happened, love. The Dark One would have saved you. I'm sure about that."

Rumple appeared in a purple puff of smoke, raising his hand as if he was ready to attack. "Where are they?!" He hissed.

"What the hell, crocodile! Get out of my house!" Killian stepped towards him threateningly.

Belle grabbed his arm. "Killian, don't…"

"Maleficent and her stupid bitches. Where are they?! I got a message… They were going to kidnap you."

Belle and Killian shared a look. "Yes… They were," Killian said. "And right now, they are heading back to their little villa's like the cowards they are, two of them probably still unconscious."

"What do you…" Rumple's eyes widened when he saw the bruises and cuts on his wife's forehead. "Belle! Are you alright?"

She shook her head. "Stop it, Rumple. I told you I don't need your protection."

"But you're hurt…" He stuttered as he stepped forward, but she backed away. "What happened? Let me heal it."

Killian stepped in front of her and glared. "Back off, mate. You're the one who keeps hurting her, over and over again."

"Belle…?"

"He is right, Rumple," she said quietly, staring down at the floor. "Please, just leave. Leave me alone."

It went silent in the room. Rumple looked between the both of them.

"What is going on here?" He asked quietly, almost in a threatening way.

No one replied.

"Please tell me this isn't what I think it is!"

"Mate, you're being ridiculous! I'm with Emma!"

"Belle!"

"What? N-no, ofcourse not! We're just friends!"

"Just like Milah and Killian were just friends, isn't it?!" He almost screamed. "Killian, I'm going to rip your heart out and crunch it, right here."

"No!" Belle quickly stood in front of him. "Please… Leave him out of this."

Rumple stepped back. "I see," he said quietly. The anger had suddenly left his voice and for a moment, he only looked hurt. "That's it, then. I'll leave you alone. The both of you. Bye, Belle."

"Rumple…" she tried, but he dissapeared. She dropped her arm and stared at where he had been.

"I'm sorry, Belle…"

"No, this isn't your fault. You were only trying to protect me." She sighed and sank down on the chair. "He's being ridiculous."  
"Yes… As he will realize, eventually." Killian sat down on the chair's arm and looked at her. "Do you still love him?" he asked carefully.

She sighed. "I don't know anymore. Right now I just want to think."

He stood up and walked to the door. "I'll leave you alone for now, then. Call me if you need anything."

She nodded gratefully and leaned back in the chair. Killian softly closed the door behind him.

* * *

"So… You are really the Mad Hatter? As in the one from Alice in Wonderland?" Heat was sitting on one of the tables in the shop and instead of working, she was observing Jefferson. Truth be told, there wasn't a lot of work she could do right now, but it still annoyed him.

"I suppose you could say so, but the story is a lot different from what you've been told." He tried to pay as less attention to her as possible, but it was hard, since the moment she arrived in the shop, she had been asking him questions non-stop. With every minute passing, he started to regret his decission to take her as his asistent, more.

"You don't really seem mad to me," she concluded. "Just a bit confused, maybe, and irritatable. And kind of a loner."

"Thank you, Heat, for your kind words." He rolled his eyes.

"Why did you stop making magical hats?"

"I don't 'make' magical hats, it's actually an extremely complicated process. In fact, after years and years of trying, I only managed to make one magical hat, which I'm pretty sure doesn't work in this town."

"So it's true… There is another world? A world where fairytales are true?" she asked excitedly.

"Well… yeah. But…"

"Can you show me?!" She jumped off the table and walked over to him.

Jefferson tried not to show how nervous her presence made him. "No, I can't. That's the thing: To get a magical hat to work, we need magic. I haven't used my hat in years, and I highly doubt it has any signs of magic left in it. Not enough to transport a bunch of villians to another world. And the least thing I want, is to go to mr. Gold to ask him if he wants to get my head to work in exchange for some kind of price."

"But if we can save the town!"

There you go with the 'we' again." Jefferson sighed deeply.

Heat rolled her eyes. "You're such a coward, Jeffy."

"Excuse me? What did you just call me?" He let go off the hat in his hands and looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

She smiled innocently. "Jeffy. Jeffy-Jeff. Jefferyjeffjeff…"

"I'm not a coward, Heat. I'm not afraid of something, I simply think it's a waste of time. Let's say I'd try, do you have any idea of how much time and work I'd have to put in it? And that with a chance of about one percent it might actually work."

"So there's a chance!"

He rolled his eyes. "You're very exhausting to be around, Heat. Did you know that?"

"Jup! I knew." She jumped off the table and planted her elbows on the counter, now looking up at him with a serious expression on her face. "But the fact is, we have a chance to save the town and you don't take that chance, because you're too afraid. That's what makes you a coward."

Jefferson looked down at her, not knowing what to say.

"So I wonder, what exactly is it that you're afraid of? What's the worst thing that could happen? That it wouldn't work, and then what?"

He sighed. "In case you haven't noticed, I don't exactly have a lot of friends in this town, Heat. Most people are afraid of me because they think I'm crazy. They see me as the Mad Hatter. And Snow isn't exactly great with secrets, I bet she's running around now telling about how I'm going to save this town. Just imagine everyone's reaction when they hear I failed?"

She started to laugh. "Wait, that's what you're afraid of? People laughing at you?"

He stepped back. "That's it, I'm done with this conversation."

"No, I'm sorry, Jeff. But maybe people are afraid of you because they don't really know you're actually just a really shy, nice guy. Maybe if you actually talk to people, you'll make friends surprisingly easy."

Jefferson raised an eyebrow. "That's what you think? Really?"

"Ofcourse!" She smiled. "Don't you want to be a hero?"

"I'm not a hero, I was the Mad Hatter and now I'm just a man trying to run a business here and your presence here is making it quite difficult to concentrate…"

"But don't you have a family you want to keep alive? A wife, children?"

Jefferson stopped working and looked at her for a few moments. "I only have my daughter, Grace."

"Grace? That's a beautiful name." Heat smiled at him. "Don't you want to protect her?"

"Ofcourse I do," he replied quietly.

She placed her hand over his and his first instinct was to pull his hand away, but she didn't let go. "Then please give it a try, Jeff. For Grace, and for the rest of the town."

He looked at her for a long time before sighing. "Alright. I'll go get the hat."

"Yes! Oh my god we're doing magic!" She yelled in excitement.

"No! Heat, magic is not something you can 'do' and…" He rolled his eyes. "Nevermind. Please try not to touch everything in this shop before I'm back." He quickly left to the back of the shop.

* * *

"Well, someone's had a rough day."

Mr. Gold sighed deeply. He didn't even have to look up to recognize her voice. "Now is not a great moment to mock me, dearie. I may or may not accidentally kill you."

"That's the Rumple I remember." The Evil Queen slowly walked over to the counter, smirking. "So. The plan of the Bitches of Darkness to get you to join us, didn't work, hm? Such a surprise…"

"And you won't either, dearie. You're wasting your time."

"Am I? Really?" She walked around the shop counter and smiled seductively at him.

"This again?" He raised an eyebrow. "What would you guys possibly have to offer me?"

"A promise," she whispered as she stepped even closer. "The safety of your bookworm and your child."

He stared back at her without showing any reaction. "Belle made it very clear today that she doesn't need my protection."

"Aha… So that's the reason of your bad mood." She laughed softly. "And yet, you still want to make sure she won't get hurt. Don't you?"

He sighed without looking away from her. "I thought you already promised me that."

"I did." She smirked. "But my friends didn't."

"Oh, no." He shook his head resolutely. "It doesn't work like that. If you want my help, I will have every single one of your friends personally individually promise not to hurt her."

She reached out to caress his face. This time, he didn't stop her. "Are you saying it's a deal, my dear?"

Rumple kept the glare. "If any of your so-called friends bring any harm to one of them anyways, I will personally kill all of you. Even if I literally have to go to Hell and back."

"Got it." She smiled and leaned forward. He didn't protest or pull away when he felt her lips touch his. And when she pushed him against the wall and started to make out with him, he wrapped his arm around her to roughly pull her closer.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Autor's note: Oh my god I just read back the old chapter and I realized the terrible amount of grammar and spelling mistakes O_O I should proofread this shit before updating it lol. Also I need to stop breaking characters apart, Jesus. I promise next chapter will be happier ;))_**

"Gold. We need your help."

Mr. Gold flinched slightly at the familiar voice, and it took him a few seconds that it was Regina and not the Evil Queen who had just burst into his shop. Images of last night flashed through his mind and he closed his eyes for a moment, trying to block everything out. It didn't work.

"Regina. I must say, I love how you literally always come straight to the point."

She rolled her eyes and walked over to the counter. The exact same way the Evil Queen had done last night. He kept his eyes on the book he was reading, avoiding her gaze.

"Do you know a way to get us into the Underworld?"

He finally dared to look up at her, trying to act casual. "In fact, I do. Just go to Hades or one of his evil badass friends and ask if they would do you the honour of killing you."

"Jesus christ, you know that's not what I mean!" Regina continued impatiently. "There must be a way that doesn't include us having to die, right? Like, so that we can come back afterwards?"

"May I ask you, why, exactly?"

She hesistated for a second and he realized she didn't trust him. Clever girl. "Can you help us or not?"

He turned around and started organizing things in his shop, much to the annoyance of his visitor. "Indeed I can. But the question is, why should I do such a thing?"

She sighed. "Because then you'll be owing us a favour?"

"Who exactly is 'us'?"

"Emma, me, the Charming dreamduo and their pirate mascotte."

He grinned. "I love how you name Emma and her 'pirate mascotte' seperately. It's almost like you don't like the idea of them being together, hm?"

Her irritated expression switched to shock and embarassment for a moment. "W-What are you trying to say?"

He smiled at her. "I think you know exactly what I'm trying to say. Your face is like an open book to me, Regina. Anyways, what could you and the Charming family possibly offer me in return?"

"Jesus, I don't know, anything! Emma could get the pirate to talk to Belle and convince her to give you a second chance…"

"No," he interrupted with a cold expression on his face. "Not interested. I think the pirate and Belle are close enough already."

He immediately regretted his words when a smirk spread across her face. "Wait… So that's what you're afraid of? The bookworm and Hook?"

"None of this is your business." Gold abruptly tried to focus his attention back on the stuff in his shop. It were moments like these when he hated the fact that they knew eachother so well, and also how much she looked like the Evil Queen when she was mocking him like this.

Regina stepped closer and laughed. "So another woman who used to love you, leaves you for the pirate? I can't imagine how painful that must be."

"I don't get why this makes you so happy, dearie. Or is it because this means Emma might be single soon?"

She stopped laughing. He smirked satisfied and turned back around.

"If you want revenge on the pirate, I can help you," she said flatly.

"First of all, dearie, if I want revenge on that loser, I don't need your help with that. And second, I'm pretty sure you hate him almost as much as I do. No, if you want my help, you and the Charming family will all be owing me a favour, which I'll use whenever I want to." He didn't even care about her stupid deal anymore. Casting a spell to send them away would be easy, he just wanted her gone now.

"Does this deal ensure that you will bring us to the Underworld and back, Gold?" She narrowed her eyes. He looked away.

"Ofcourse, dearie. Now would you be so kind to leave me alone?"

"Then we have a deal. And alright, I'll leave you alone with your misery." She rolled her eyes and turned to leave.

He clenched his fists and hesistated for a few moments, before deciding to get it over with. "Regina, there's something you need to know. And I figured it would be better if I'd tell you right now, because eventually you'll find out anyways and it will just make things more… awkward."

Regina turned around with a raised eyebrow. "What?"

"You're not going to be happy with this," he warned.

"Gold? What did you do?!"

He tried to think of a proper way to say it, only to realize there wasn't a proper way. "The Evil Queen. That's what I did."

"What?!"

"She came to my shop yesterday to make some kind of deal – which, ofcourse I didn't accept because I know better than to to business with that woman anymore…"

"Alright, that better not be a lie…"

"It's not," he lied smoothly. "But anyways… I guess she was angry because I didn't accept her deal, because she started to…"

"She did what, Gold?!" Regina asked sharply. "Oh my god please tell me this isn't what I think it is…"

"It is. I had sex with her in my shop last night." He closed his eyes.

"YOU DID WHAT?!" She screamed.

"I didn't want to at first!"

"MR. RUMPLESTILTSKIN GOLD, A FEW DAYS AGO YOU SWORE THAT YOU HAD NO INTEREST IN HER!"

"I didn't! But she was… quite hard to resist. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about."

"YOU HAD SEX WITH MY OTHER… Oh my god, I think I'm going to get sick." She hid her face in her hands in disgust and embarassment.

"I know, it was a big mistake… It won't happen again."

"Jesus Christ, this is even more disgusting than my mother kissing the Blind Bitch in front of me. You… and my other half, a part of me… in this shop?!"

"Right here on the counter."

"No, stop! I didn't ask for details!" She shook her head. "Please make sure I won't ever have to see you again, Gold." With these words, she loudly slammed the door behind her.

"Happily," he mumbled.

* * *

"This is it?" Heat looked at the hat with a raised eyebrow. "Is this old thing really going to transport people to the magical fairytale land?"

Jefferson laughed softly. "That's the idea. Like I said, I'm not sure if it will work."

"Then go try it out!"

"Calm down, patience is key. Heat, please close the door and pull down the curtains. It's not exactly good for business if customers walk in on me doing magical hat tricks."

"On my way!" She jumped off the table.

Jefferson carefully put the hat on the table and looked down at it. It didn't look like it was still containing a lot of magic. He had mixed feelings about this. Let's say it did work, and then what? He didn't want to be the Mad Hatter again, now that he finally had a chance to live a peaceful life with his daughter.

"Nope, not happening. We're doing this."

"What?" He blinked and looked at Heat in confusion.

"You're having second thoughts, I can see it by the frown on your face. But you promised me to do magic, so we're doing magic!"

"Yeah, ofcourse." He rolled his eyes. "Okay Heat, I need you to listen carefully. Before we try transporting actual persons, I am going to practise this on an object."

"Alright." She grabbed a grey scarf from one of the shelves. "This should do."

He raised an eyebrow. "No it won't, Heat I can still sell this?"

"Like anyone is going to buy this old thing."

"Alright." He rolled his eyes and put his hands on the hat. "Step back."

She did as he said and watched in excitement. He took a deep breath and mentally counted to three before spinning the hat around.

A purple cloud of magic appeared around the hat as it spinned around faster and faster.

"Oh my god! I told you it would work!" Heat yelled over the loud noise of the magic.

"Yeah, you did." Jefferson rolled his eyes again, but he couldn't help but smile. "The scarf, quickly!"

She handed him the scarf and he threw the piece of cloth into the portal of magic. A few seconds later, the magic dissapeared and the hat slowly stopped spinning.

The scarf was gone.

Both of them stared at the hat, out of breath.

"That was… wow." Heat smiled. "Is it really in the Enchanted Forest right now, Jeff?"

He smiled back at her. "It should be."

"This was awesome! Should we do it again? With this, for example?" Heat looked around the shop and grabbed a hat which looked like it had been on the same shelf for years. "You won't miss this either."

Jefferson shook his head resolutely. "No, no more vanishing perfectly sealable objects from my shop."

"Ahw, why not?"

"Because…" He flashed a smirk. "We now know that the magic is strong enough to teleport magical objects, but that doesn't mean it's strong enough to teleport people as well. So let's find out, shall we?"

Her eyes widened. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying it's time to pay a visit to the alysum. The people there like are those objects in my shop: No one would miss them."

* * *

"So this is Robin? She's grown a lot since last time I saw her."

Zelena looked up from the perambulator when she heard his voice. Hades leaned against a tree and was watching her.

"Yeah… I actually changed her name since Robin is back, because with two Robins in town it would be a bit awkward." She carefully picked up her baby from the perambulator. "It's Pistacchio now."

"Pistacchio. I suppose I like it better than that idiot's name." Hades laughed slightly and walked over to her. Apart from the two of them, there weren't a lot of people out in the park and she instinctively held Pistacchio closer. He noticed and stopped walking, a hint of sadness flashed through his eyes but it was quickly gone.

Zelena shrugged. "Regina wasn't too happy about it…"

"Wasn't she?" He frowned. "That's strange. It's your baby, you should be the one to choose her name, right?

"I suppose… I feel like she blames me for the fact that Robin thinks he's gay now."

"That's ridiculous."

"Yeah… What do you want, Hades?" Zelena asked quietly. "I told you I need some time to think…"

"I know, but… I need to tell you something."

"Okay…"

"You were right. I lied to you."

"What a surprise." She rolled her eyes.

"The truth is, I am indeed having meetings with my friends in my villa, and… It is true that we want revenge on Storybrooke. I'm not giving that up, Zelena."

"But why? What will revenge ever get you? It won't make you happy, I know that from my own experience." She softly caressed Pistacchio's face.

"But don't you want revenge? Your sister has always had everything that was supposed to be yours, and yet, she's still being incredibly rude to you."

"What happened in the past, happened. We're trying to move past it now…"

Hades reached out to touch her face. She freezed at first but then relaxed. "But if I see you like this… I'm getting the impression that you're the only one trying."

She looked down. "I have to make up for all the mistakes I made."

"Who told you that? Regina?" He frowned.

She sighed. "What are you trying to say, Hades?"

"I know you think that all we want is revenge. To kill and destroy the lives of everyone in Storybrooke. But that's not why we're here. In fact… We're not going to kill anyone."

Zelena slightly narrowed her eyes in suspect. "Then why would all of you team up to discuss the future of Storybrooke?"

"We all have our own reasons, but most of us simply want to protect the people we care about."

"Then what's your reason?" she asked quietly.

He went silent for a moment. "You. To protect you. And Pistacchio."

"What do you mean? I'm perfectly safe here in Storybrooke, and so is she… right?"

He looked at her. "You really don't know, do you…?"

"Know what? Hades, what are you talking about?"

"Regina. Now that Robin is back, don't you think he'll want to see his daughter?"

She swallowed and held Pistacchio closer. "I haven't thought of that yet…"

"And do you really think that he will be okay with only seeing her every once in a while? And what do you think will happen, when Regina and Robin are back together – because they will, eventually?"

"Do you… do you mean that they'll want to take away my little girl?" She looked alarmed.

"Ofcourse they will. You're the only thing standing between the both of them, and their happiness."

"How would you know any of this?"

"Because of your sister. Well, your sister's evil half… Yeah, I suppose she's your sister as well. She knows exactly how Regina thinks, Zelena. She warned me about this."

Zelena shrugged. "Then why didn't she come here to tell me that myself?"

"Because, actually…" He stepped closer. "I wanted to tell you, because then I would have a reason to talk to you. I miss you, Zelena. And besides, your sister and I both think you'll be safer if you move away from Regina. We can protect Pistacchio, and you and I can take care of her… like the family we always wanted to be."

She looked at him for a long time. Then she sighed and put Pistacchio back in the perambulator. "I don't know about this, Hades. I'll think about it, maybe. And… I'm going to talk to Regina. If what you just told me is true…"

He nodded and smiled at her. "I understand, take all the time you need."

Zelena looked down at her daughter and back to Hades. "I won't loose Pistacchio… She's all I have."

"You won't. I won't let it happen." He softly kissed her cheek. "Take care, Zelena. And if you ever need me, I'll be right here."

She watched him walk away, holding onto the perambulator tightly.

* * *

"He agreed." Regina sat down next to Emma at the table at Granny's. the bench was actually only suitable for two people, and Hook, who sat on Emma's other side, shot her an annoyed look when he almost got shoved off the bench. "Gold said he knows a way to get us to the Underworld. Ofcourse, now we owe him some kind of favour in return, but whatever." She rolled her eyes.

"That's… good, I suppose," Emma said, slightly caught off guard. "Did he mention how exactly he could do this?"

"This spell Zelena casted to bring them all here? Hades helped her with that, but Gold thinks that you, me and he should be able to do it together."

"I'm not sure about this, Regina." Snow frowned and shared a worried look with David. "How can we be sure we won't end up being stuck in the Underworld again?"

"Well… about that." She bit her lip. "I suppose Emma and I should stay here, just to be sure we can get the rest of you back once you get the water from the River of Lost Souls." She lowered her voice to make sure the other people in the lunchroom wouldn't hear.

"So that's your plan, love? To send me and Emma's parents off to the Underworld and let us do the dirty work?" Hook raised an eyebrow, not exactly looking forward to the scenario of being stuck in the Underworld with his girlfriends' boring parents.

"That's the idea, yes, but if you have something better in mind, I'm all open to suggestions," she replied coldly.

"I'm afraid Regina is right, mate." David flashed a wry smile. "If we want to make sure we can get back alive, this is the only way."

Emma nodded briefly. "I don't like this, at all. But if necessary, I will make sure all of you get to the Underworld and back, safely. Only if everyone is okay with it, though." She looked at Snow questioningly. "Mom?"

She shivered. "I… I'm not exactly looking forward to go back to the Underworld, and I can't just leave the children at the school, just like that…"

David put his arm around her. "It's okay, darling, I understand. You can stay, if you want to."

"No… No, if you are doing this, I am in too." She took a deep breath and smiled bravely at him. "I'm not letting you do this alone. You're my true love and together, we can do anything."

Hook pretended to cough to keep a straight face and Regina subtly looked away, rolling her eyes, but Emma didn't notice any of it. She looked at her parents on the opposite of the table, and smiled. They were the living proove that true love did exist. She wasn't always so sure about Killian and her, but her parents were true love, there was no doubt about that.

David laughed and kissed his wife on her forehead. "That's settled, then. We're going on an adventure, together, just like the old days."

"And we don't have to worry about anything possibly going wrong…" Snow smiled, almost getting tears in her eyes from happiness. "Because we will always…."

"…find eachother," Hook and Regina both said at the same time, mocking them. "Yes, we know."

"Guys, please!" Emma couldn't help but laugh. "You are horrible, I hate you both. And mom, dad?" She smiled at her parents, blinking hard to hide her emotions. "I will do everything I can to make sure the two of you will get back here safely."

"We know, sweety." Snow took her daughter's hand over the table and forced a reassuring smile. Neither of them were looking forward to the idea of getting seperated again.

"It doesn't have to be long, right?" Emma swallowed hard. "Maybe two, three days should be enough to get some water from the River…."

"Yes… Exactly."

Regina glanced over at her friend, noticing how hard she was trying not to show emotions, so she subtly changed the subject. "Alright, I think we should pay the two scientist lovebirds a visit, then."

"Scientist lovebirds?" No one had noticed Ruby suddenly standing next to them. She laughed. "Come on, don't look so shocked. Did I miss something?"

"No. You didn't," Regina said shortly, but Snow smiled brightly.

"Well, actually. Jeckyll and Whale are together! Who would've seen that coming, hm?"

"Snow, don't!" Regina tried, but it was too late.

"WHAT?! JECKYLL AND WHALE?!" Ruby bursted out laughing. "Oh my God! No way!" Everyone at Granny's went silent for a moment, before exclamations of shock and surprise were heard everywhere.

Regina sighed deeply and Emma dropped her head to her arms. Snow's already pale face went even paler. "Oh god, I'm so sorry! What did I do! Ruby, please, don't tell anyone… I… I wasn't supposed to tell…"

"Ohw… Well, it's kinda too late for that my dear." Ruby grinned. "But seriously! Two scientist nerds together, that's adorable!"

"Yeah… I suppose," Snow mumbled, looking down in embarassment.

David put his arm around her and pulled her close. "Hey… It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes…"

"And this was a pretty big one," Hook mumbled.

"No, David, it's not alright! Oh my god, Regina is right, I really am terrible with secrets!"

"No shit," Regina commented with a straight face. She stood up abruptly. "Alright, let's go to Whale and Jeckyll, see if they can actually help us… before they find out about this. Because then we're screwed."

"Yes… Let's go." The rest of them stood up as well. As they made their way to the exit, Hook grabbed Emma's arm.

"Hey, love… do you have a moment?" he said quietly.

Emma sighed and gestured to her parents, who looked over their shoulders questioningly, that she would be a bit later. "What's it?"

"I just… I think we need to talk," Hook said quietly as they walked out of Granny's. "about us."

"Really? Now? Killian, I'm sorry but there's a lot of problems to be dealt with right now and…"

"I know… but don't you think that right now, we should be there for eachother? I think that especially in times like this, communication is important…"

"I suppose. Maybe." Emma tried not to look impatient.

"And I don't want to bother you or something but, the fact is that about a week ago you asked me to move in with you and you've been avoiding me since. If you're having second thoughts, I understand, but you just need to tell me, okay?"

"I'm not having second thoughts," she replied shortly. "Just a lot of shit on my head."

He took a step back. "So you still want this? Us?"

"I don't know, okay? I don't know what I want."

"You don't know?"

"I'm sorry, Killian," Emma whispered.

"I just don't understand… About a week ago, you seemed pretty sure… What changed?"

"Nothing." She looked away.

"Emma… Is it Neal?"

"No. Not him."

"But… someone else."

"No! But… It's a fact that soon, we're going to be apart for who knows how long anyways so why would we even bother trying?!"

"So… that's why you decide to push me away? So that it will hurt less?" He frowned.

"No. Yes." She bit her lip, trying to blink back tears. "Partly."

"Emma…" He tried to hug her, but she turned away.

"Please. Don't. Not right now. I just can't, okay? I'm sorry."

When she saw the pain in his eyes, she turned around and walked away as fast as possible.

* * *

"This meeting better won't be a waste of my time." Mr. Gold shot the both of his companions a threatening glare as the Evil Queen teleported the three of them to a spot close to the villa.

"Ofcourse not, darling." The Evil Queen winked and linked her arm with his. "I promise it will be almost as pleasurable as last night was," she added in a a sweet voice.

He rolled his eyes and pulled his arm away. "I thought we agreed on the fact that this never happened."

"Uh… oops?"

"Wait, what? What happened last night?" Mr. Hyde raised an eyebrow when they started to walk towards the door.

"Well, apparantly, it's nothing now." The queen smirked.

"Whát was nothing?" He continued in a sharp voice.

"Jesus Christ, fine, we had sex in my shop, I'm not proud of it and it will never happen again." Gold slammed the door open. "And now you guys are already getting on my nerves, not a great start."

"You did what?!" Hyde stopped walking to stare at her in disbelief. Gold kept walking."Oh, wow… Didn't realize you making a deal with Gold would include sex in his shop."

"I did make a deal. This deal was the serious part and the thing that happened afterwards, excuse me, the thing that did nót happen afterwards.. that was the fun part." She laughed.

"Yeah… It surely must have been fun for him," he mumbled.

She observed him from the corner of her eye. "Is that jealousy?"

"Ofcourse not. Just disgust."

"Hm, sure." She winked. "Maybe the next time nothing happens, we can make it a threesome if you'd like."

"As long as he's included, I'm not interested," he mumbled, discreetly staring at the paintings on the wall.

"Hm? What?"

"Nothing." He quickly continued walking and they entered the room. Rumple was talking to Hades by the fireplace.

Not much had changed since last time. Pan was sitting on the same wooden chair in the back of the room, observing everyone like a shadow, his loyal boyfriend standing behind him. The three Queens of Darkness were sharing one couch, together with a pretty girl with bright orange hair. Since there were four of them now, they were basically sitting on top of eachother and it was difficult to see which legs and arms belonged to who. James was staring at them from the opposite couch, giving the impression he would much rather share the other couch with them instead. Cora had claimed one of the armchairs as her own and was sitting there like she was still the queen, except for the fact that she was gently brushing her fingers through the curly hair of Warda, who sat down on the ground in front of her, resting her head in the other woman's lap. Ingrid was sitting on the other armchair. She had traded her iced dress for more wearable clothes this time, but everything in her body and face seemed to radiate ice-cold air.

Hyde walked over to James and brutally kicked his legs away, making space for himself to sit.

"Auch, Jesus what's your problem?! You could have asked nicely! No reason for such violence, big guy." James scolded and rubbed his legs.

Hyde shrugged. "You could have not taken up all the free space on that couch."

"Oooh burn!" Warda yelled from the other chair. Cora looked down at her and smiled.

James hopefully looked over at the four women on the couch again. "Ladies, this poor man just almost got kicked off his own couch. Don't you think he deserves some comfort?" He winked.

Cruella laughed hoarsely. "But ofcourse, darling. You can sit on my lap. We just have to…" She pushed Ursula off her lap, causing the other women to protest. "make a little space."

"See, being nice isn't hard! Hyde, you guys can have the couch for yourselves." James laughed and quickly walked over to the other couch, looking very satisfied with himself. But just as he wanted to sit down, Maleficent lazily kicked out her foot, stopping him.

"I'm sorry, 'darling', but this couch is women only," she said dryly.

"Ah, come on! Don't be so childish, Mal," James said pleadingly.

"Really? You're the pathetic boy who expects us to welcome you with open arms just because your little ego was hurt and now you're calling hér pathetic?" The girl with the orange hair laughed and leaned her head on Mal's shoulder.

Mal laughed also and wrapped her arms around the other girl, pulling her closer. "You tell him, Jenni."

"Cruella…?" He tried.

The woman smiled sweetly and pulled Ursula back on her lap. "You know I'd love to feel your muscular, handsome arms around me, darling, but I'm not stupid enough to go against Mal. Sorry."

"Damn, only James would manage to get his ego cracked twice in only five minutes time," Cora commented mockingly.

James turned back around in embarassment, only to see that Hyde and the Evil Queen had now completely taken up all the space on the other couch.

"Ah, come on guys!" he yelled out. "This is ridiculous."

Hyde smiled falsely at him. "Too bad, if only you had asked me nicely, maybe I would have moved. But now it's too late."

"I think there's still a free spot for you down on the ground, by the fireplace at Hades's feet," the queen added in a sweet voice.

James looked around the room hopelessly, but none of the persons in the room seemed willing to move one inch. He sighed deeply and had no other choice then to sit down on the ground.

Ingrid rolled her eyes in annoyance.

"Jesus, I feel like I'm in a fucking kindergarten," Peter Pan mumbled to Felix without moving his gaze away from the other people.

Felix looked down at his leader and nodded in a agreement. "You're right. Couldn't have said it any better."

"I'm wasting my time. If this meeting will be like the last one, I'd rather go back to the Underworld."

"Exactly! And I would be coming with you."

"Ofcourse you would. Like you could live without me."

"Yes… I wouldn't want to live without you even for a second." Felix sighed. Sometimes he wondered if his undying and unconditional love for the other boy was going a bit to far, but at the moment he looked into those beautiful eyes again…

"Alright, that's enough eye-sex and bitchfights for tonight. We're here on a mission." Hades resisted the urge to clap his hands to get everyone's attention like a real teacher in kindergarten would do. His eyes scanned the group and he raised an eyebrow at the girl with the orange hair. "Who is this?"

"The name is Jenni, and I'm perfectly able to talk for myself." Jenni rolled her eyes.

He narrowed his eyes. "Maleficent, I don't remember allowing you to bring your girlfriends to our secret meetings."

"Be nice, Hades." Mal pulled the other girl closer and shot Hades a warning glance. "We can trust her. She is one of us now."

"Seriously?! I've never even seen her before!"

"Chill your ass down, Hades." Cruella lit a cigarette. "We met her last night in the rabbit hole. Then we went home and…"

"We had a steaming hot foursome," Jenni added dryly.

Mal laughed. "Couldn't have worded it any better."

"Ooh, can I join next time?!" James asked eagerly.

Cruella winked at him. "Mal doesn't allow men in her bedroom, but you know you can join me and Urs any time."

"Oh really? Can he?" Ursula mumbled.

"I can see these meanings are really efficient," Rumple said impatiently. "Get to the point, Hades."

"Yeah… Yeah, I was just about to do that. My friends, this man standing next to me, as you probably all know, is here known as mr. Gold, aka Rumplestiltskin, aka the Dark One," he said with undisguished admiration in his voice. Mr. Gold rolled his eyes and looked around the room. Except for Jenni and the blonde woman who was apparantly Cora's new lover, he did indeed know pretty much everyone.

"Ah, mr. Gold! It's a great pleasure to meet you!" Cruella said in an extravagantedly excited voice. The other women on the couch laughed.

"Shut it, Fuzzy. Some of us are trying to make plans here, we don't need you to sass everyone," Pan yelled at her from the back of the room.

"Thanks a lot, Pan, but as I'm sure I have said before, I'm perfectly able to shut people up by myself," Hades said impatiently. "Okay, so I'm guessing you guys do indeed already know him. Great. Mr. Gold, aka Rumplestiltskin, aka the Dark One, is here to help us with our plan, but…"

"But I want something in return," Mr. Gold interrupted and he narrowed his eyes at the people in the room. "If anyone lays one hand on Belle or my unborn son while carrying out your stupid bullshit plans, I will personally kill everyone in this room. Are we clear?"

James swallowed. "Every single one?! Is that necessary?"

"Yes. That is necessary," Gold said darkly. "Anyone else wants to make a smartass comment?"

This time, everyone stayed silent.

Hades looked at Gold with wide, stunned eyes. "Woah… You really do know how to make people shut up, don't you?"

Gold rolled his eyes. "So, correct me if I'm wrong but so far, your plan is basically to create a barrier of ice around this town so that no one can leave, cut Storybrooke in three parts, kill everyone who needs to be killed and save everyone who needs to be saved to give every… creature here their happy ending they think they deserve, right?"

"Well, we still need to perfectionize it a bit, but… pretty much, yeah."

"Yeah. Let's get straight to the point: Not gonna work."

"What?! Why would it not work?!" Hades sounded dissapointed and a bit hurt.

"Because you can't simply put a bunch of idiots together and expect to be able to meet everyone's wishes. Let me see." Gold grabbed the piece of paper Hades was holding and read through it. "Warda gets to eat all the children? An endless fontain of gin for Cruella?" He raised an eyebrow. "Pan gets to kill me? Seriously?"

"Well, euh… we were still discussing that one," Hades stammered nervously.

"James gets to kill Charming?" Gold laughed. "I would pay thousands to see that. So, no. This is not working." He ripped the paper to pieces.

"Jesus, someone's got a temper," Mal mumbled.

Cruella laughed. "Says the woman who turns herself into a dragon whenever she gets angry."

"I'd say burn, but that seems slightly inappropriate given the situation," Cora commented.

"But… if this doesn't work, then… what will?" Hades asked carefully.

"I know you guys didn't come back from the Underworld just for nothing. You all want something. To rule over Storybrooke and feel powerful, to be happy with the people you love, revenge, whatever. But you're barely even working together. Let's be honest here, everyone is just exclaiming their wishes but you guys don't even have a proper plan to make it actually happen, or do you?"

"Well… Our plan was to cut Storybrooke in three parts."

"Yeah, that's what I got so far." Rumple rolled his eyes again. "First of all, I don't think so. I don't think we can say every single person in this room is responsible enough to run a piece of this goddamn town by themselves without screwing up."

"Maybe two pieces then. One for me, one for Hyde."

"No, I suggest you give Storybrooke back to me, and then I can make sure…"

"Hold on, friend." Hyde stood up and walked over to the fireplace. James glanced over at the now free spot on the couch, but decided not to take the risk.

"We made a deal. You gave me Storybrooke in exchange for information. You can't just break that deal." Hyde stood in front of Gold, refusing to let the other man intimidate him.

Gold sighed impatiently. "I know you want this town, 'friend', but so does Hades here." He turned to Hades with a raised eyebrow. "Or are you seriously telling me that the only thing you want is to start a happy family with Zelena?"

"Well… It was my main goal, ofcourse, but it would be nice if I could also rule over this town without those annoying heroes like Zelena's sister stopping me," Hades said uncomfortably.

"That's too bad then, mate. This town isn't yours. It's mine."

"But we already discussed it! You would get the part with the harbour!"

"Well, on second thoughts, I changed my mind. The Dark One aka Rumplewhatever gave me that town, he can't simply hand a part of it over to you now. Not without my permission."

Rumplestiltskin ignored him, much to his annoyance, and looked at Hades with a raised eyebrow. "Alright so you want to cut the town in half, hm? How, exactly?"

"Well, I thought I could maybe build a wall…"

"A wall, seriously? Who do you think you are, Donald freaking Trump?"

"Donald who?"

Rumple rolled his eyes. "Not gonna work, dearie. So like I was saying: How about I keep this town until I've got rid of the heroes, and then hand it back to Hyde and let the two of you fight over it. It's for your own good, because with all these heroes running around and you both in charge of a part of Storybrooke, I'm pretty sure things are meant to go wrong."

The two men thought about it for a moment.

"How exactly do you plan on getting rid of the heroes?" Hyde narrowed his eyes.

"I have a plan. You need to trust me on this one, dearie." Rumple smiled wryly. "In less than three days, they're gone. Meanwhile, I suggest you quit these stupid 'meetings' and make everyone individually get their revenges by themselves. This whole teaming-up-thing? Waste of time."

He dissapeared in a puff of smoke.

"That was badass," Cora commented.

"Hot," the queen added.

"His ego is too big for his brain." Hyde rolled his eyes and walked back to the couch.

"Well… He kind of does have a point," Hades admitted. "This will be our last meeting… for now."

"Such a shame," Ingrid commented dryly, despite the fact she had been quiet during the entire meeting.

Cruella wiggled her eyebrows. "So… who's up for an orgy?"

 _ **Autor's note: Sooooo I have exams coming up next weeks and I probably won't be able to write a lot, so I'm sorry if I can't update for a while. But I'll try ;))**_


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